Reuben Album

So fire it is
To make our dark streets clean again
Like a 'reset' button on our lives
Like hands of God
Just dusting off the blackboard

And with all we've worked for gone
And all we cherished lost
We can start again

So play your violin
And breathe the sulphur in
Take it on the chin
As London sheds its skin

Play your violin
And try to hide your grin
As it burns away your sin
And London sheds its skin

"Where are your churches and libraries?
Where are your books and your memories?"

We burned it all
We burned it all...

At school the choices I made
Were rock and roll bands
And getting good grades.

But brains and wearing all black
To some of these guys
It's like a red flag.

The taste of anyone's fist
Is not a good vibe, or something I've missed.
I was intimidated, assaulted, and for what?
I hope they choke...

Shrugged off the shit in my youth
Like growing up pains or losing a tooth
But it's not a matter of age
They're everywhere
These people don't change

When I was in New York
A woman tried to start a fight with me
Because she thought I was Jewish
And somehow it felt wrong to tell her I wasn't
And I pray to God she chokes...

You're going home in a fucking ambulance...

I once saw a man
With blood on his face
From beating up black kids
And I could hardly breathe

Your race, your faith
Or just your clothes incite
They drink and they fight
It's not safe out tonight

Your race, your faith
Or just your clothes incite
They drink and they fight
So don't go out tonight, don't!

If your mum and dad
Hit you as a child
I feel sad for you
But that's no excuse for it

Who says it's okay
To behave in this way?
I can't help but feel it's us
For the sake of our own skin
We walk away, and it's like we all say
"That's alright, it's alright, it's alright..."

I wish I had the guts
To stand up for myself
And for the others as well
Against these fuckers

Choke...

I thought that I
Was full of such
Hope and light
And such love
But all my words
I wrote them for you
And all my songs
I sang them for you

Photos of me
They all show
A staring man
I don't know

You know that I've been
Through all this nonsense with you
And all my words
I broke them for you
And all my plans
I snapped them in two

I could create
Like it was stealing
I love to sing
How I was feeling
I had a soul
That burned for beauty
But who gives a shit?
I must admit
Oh yes

I've lost it a little bit...

I can't breathe
This atmosphere
Wait 'til I get out of here
'Cos I have wasted year after year
And smile I may
But it's insincere my dear

My dear...

Soft little body
Swollen by the sun
Waiting for the break
That he knows will never come
Four brittle limbs
Weak from under-use
And a head full of words

Long green hair
Funny looking dude
Big mouth on him
And a wicked attitude
And at first impression
He must seem kind of rude
But he does his best, yeah?

And anyway...

I want to be
Just like you
Get myself a job
And a really cool tattoo

I'm walking home
Beside you
Your hair is long and blonde
And your eyes are both bright blue

I want to be just like you
In all I do

Jimmy got drunk
On his way to class
Swinging from the roof
Showed everyone his ass
And if you ask him why
He shakes his head and laughs
"There was nothing for it"

Stacy got laid
Boyfriend number one!
Took him to her room
And had a little fun
She's wearing out her voice
Telling everyone
And you can't ignore it

And anyway...

I want to be
Just like you
Get myself a job
And a really cool tattoo

I'm walking home
Beside you
Your hair is long and blonde
And your eyes are both bright blue

I want to be
Just like you
Get myself a job
And a really cool tattoo

Really cool tattoo...

It's only 'cos I like you
You are everything I wish I could be
And maybe if I'm like you
Baby would you like me?

You're dressed
Like a Victorian at a swimming pool
You're dressed
Like a deadly lethal ninja assassin
All in black

I want to be just like you...

I want to be
Just like you
Get myself a job
And a really cool tattoo

I made you Trent Reznor
Spinning on his back
With a motorised action
You made me
A red and black scarf
I wear it round my neck
But no motorised action

No motorised action...

I'm trying to make up my mind
Madness or cruel-to-be-kind?
Your mother was sick or blind
When she gave her child away

But what she did
She did out of love
She must have meant it
As an act of kindness

And having never had a kid myself
I cannot understand the pressures
"...you must be sick in the head
You need a hospital bed" she said
"Properly fed" she said
"Or you're going to wind up dead"

So you were put
In the hands of science
Strangers who understood
Better than mothers could
It was really "for your own good"

See, we find these ways
To justify it all
Are they really working?

I'm trying to make up my mind

I'm trying to make up my mind
It gets harder every time
I see a baby mother
Or think about growing up and having kids

Oh God, she must have done it out of love
I must believe it was an act of kindness
I keep imagining the film 'Girl Interrupted'
With less attractive inmates

"All of the things that you feel
They are a fucking disease" they said
"We diagnose it with ease" they said
"There is no hope of a release" they said

So you found yourself
Inside a prison with no escape
Tied to a gurney with thick red tape
Nursing a wound that is mother-shape

"When can I go back home?
I want to make a fucking call
All these pills do is make me sleep..."
Onetwoonetwoonetwo

You wished you could unmake yourself
Become something else
To be something awful
"To be smoke and shadow"

I understand the idea that A.D.D. is an imbalance
'Depression,' that is an imbalance of chemicals
It makes sense.

But couldn't you argue that everything is?
Joy, fear, anger, sadness?
Can you diagnose love?
Can you diagnose loss?
See, we find this ways
To justify it all
But is it really working?

I can still remember
When I first heard the riff
That opens 'Nevermind' up
My neck-hairs stood up stiff

And since those first discoveries
I've tried to recreate
The feeling I had back then
But nothing sounds that great

So please give me an album
That I love straight away
That I don't have to grow in to
After constant play

See, I buy a lot of records
And take most of them back
'Cos I feel that disappointment
After just one track

And I can't move on...

Last band stole my heart
Was Every Time I Die
I loved every second
But now three years gone by

When I heard 'Worship and Tribute'
I thought my dreams come true
Listening to most other bands
It seems they all did too

All this eighties indie
Sounds like shit to me
'Cos I don't like Joy Division
I don't like Morrissey
Or their new impersonators
Kings of MTV
Suckling at the teat
Of the fucking NME

And I can't move on...

Long ago, I woke up early
For a job I used to love
But then, one Saturday morning
My boss gave me the shove

He made it clear that
I was not needed any more
He'd had to hire in some other guy
While we were away on tour

But a few words in his defense
There was no bullshit pretense
And it made perfect business sense

So he sent me away
And I wanted to say
"OK. Good luck.
I hope I never see you again.
Good luck. Yeah."

There was this girl I slept with
She got inside my head
And when I say 'slept'
I don't mean just sex
I mean we shared a bed

I thought that we were married
I thought we'd be OK
But then she made it clear that
She didn't feel that way

She said "It was lovely at the start
But there's a space inside my heart
And I think we have grown apart
So go take a hike..."

Man I was just like
"All right. Good luck.
I hope I never see you again
'Cos if this is goodbye
Good luck. Good luck.
I hope I never see you again
'Cos if this is goodbye
I hope that you die"

'Cos if you hurt me
I will hate you
It's just as simple as that
It's not mature
And it's not progressive
But that doesn't alter the fact

That if you hurt me, I will hate you
If you hurt me, I will erase you
If you hurt me, I will hate you
If you hurt me, I will forget you

Just a big bass line and drums
Got guitarists sucking their thumbs
For a bar or two that's how to do it

Press the keys it makes it swell
I don't pretend I can play very well
But I like what piano brings to it

Before the idea gives way
I press 'Record' and I press 'Play'
'Cos like a pain in my head
It won't let go
Like a beast in my bed
I can't say no
Like a crack in the windshield of my soul
It is agony, Agatha

Just a verse and a chorus now
In my brain, playing around and around
And around on a loop under my bonnet

Sometimes when I'm trying to write songs
I imagine I turn the radio on
And think about what I'd like to hear on it

Thumping drums and chords
That's what I'm all about
Add bass and keyboards
And you've got everyone rocking out! Yeah!

'Cos like a pain in my head
It won't let go
Like a beast in my bed
I can't say no
Like a stain on the carpet of my soul
It is agony, Agatha!

It is all you need, Agatha
It is agony...

I am regret
I am doubt
I am alone
I am without
I am despair
I am guilt
I am the sand on which I built
I am malaise
I'm wasted youth
I am agression
I'm ugly truth
I am refusal
I am attack
I got the world sat on my back

And I can't stand the weight...

I am revolt
I am abuse
I am 'gave up'
I am excuse
I'm pessimism
I'm jealousy
I am impatience and bigotry
I am a pain
I am a bore

But when you sing
People tend to listen more
Is this a song?
Well no, it ain't
This is a musical complaint
I got hate
I got rage
I got enough for twice my age

And this feeling of distaste
Will not desist, it will not stop

And I can't stand the weight...

And I am going to break
These things in my heart
Dark and disgusting
Feeding and growing
Taking over

All of us are born the same
The same as Pol-Pot
The same as Christ
And it's all within my frame
To do something awful
Or something nice
Say three hail marys for me

Girl, your mouth is open wide
And I can see everything inside
You better keep your mouth shut for now
Ah, girl, yeah your mouth is open wide
And I can see everything you hide
You better keep your mouth shut

Girl, your mouth is open wide
And I can see everything that you hide
All of the times that you lied
So keep your mouth shut

Where'd you get that face?
How's about you bring it back to my place
And keep your mouth shut?

You're taking sides
You're 'wrong' or 'right'
You're 'run' or 'fight'
Your choice

You're taking sides
You're taking sides
You're taking sides
You're taking...

I feel like reading books is
Wrapping me up in layers of history
Layers of history

And I feel like singing songs is
Wrapping me up in layers of history
Layers of history
Oh yeah

You're holding hands
You're making kids
You're growing old
Dying

Everything you do
Now matter how small it might seem to you
Affects something else
Trust me it's true!

'cos I feel like being here is
Wrapping me up in layers of history
Layers of history

And I feel like seeing this is
Wrapping me up in layers of history
Layers of history
Oh yeah

I feel like breathing in is
Wrapping me up in layers of history
Layers of history

Just simply existing is
Wrapping me up in layers of history
Layers of history
Oh Yeah

Oh...

I feel like being here is
Wrapping me up in layers of history
Layers of history

I feel like feeling this is
Wrapping me up in layers of history
Layers of history

Do you remember our best adventure?
Stealing off to climb Westers Hill?
Creeping out of our house at midnight?
Do you remember on the way down after
I cut my leg right open on that fence?
And I cried and I cried

It was just a hill we climbed that night
But it felt like top of the world
"Top of the world, ma!"
I'm on top of the world
"Our teachers had faith in their lessons
Their doctrine, but these facts are unreliable
These cracks are undeniable," you said

"Do you feel the warmth beneath your feet?
That's cos the Earth is so very old"
They should have warned us years ago
We should have been told that secret
Kept by Mum and Dad which covered everything
"At first it's dark
And then it's light
And then it's dark again..."

"You're bleeding, but it's alright
'Cos we'll stay awake the whole night
'Cos I found a rock in an ancient place
And it's older than the human race
So let's build a fire
A homing light
For astronauts and satellites
For scientists with soldier's hearts
For pioneers of Earthly arts
You and me
We're dead in the blink of an eye
We've been and gone
We're dead in a blink of the Earth's eye"