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04/24/2007 |
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Sunlight coming through the haze
No gaps in the blinds
To let it inside
The bed is unmade, some music still plays
TV, yeah it's always on
A flicker of the screen
A movie actor screams
I'm basking in the shit flowing out of it
I'm stoned in the mall again
Terminally bored
Shuffling around the stores
And shoplifting is getting so last year’s thing
Xbox is a god to me
My finger on the switch
My mother is a bitch
My father gave up ever trying to talk to me
Don't try engaging me
The vaguest of shrugs
The prescription drugs
You'll never find a person inside
My face is smothered on
Curiosity is good enough for me
I'm tuning out his eyes
Pills are on the rise
How can I be sure I'm here?
The pills that I've been taking confuse me
I need to know that someone sees that
There's nothing left, I simply am not here
I'm through with pornography
The acting is lame
The action is tame
Explicitly dull, or rather a lull
Your mouth should be boarded up
Talking all day with nothing to say
Your shallow proclamations
All misinformation
My friend says he wants to die
He's in a band, they sound like Pearl Jam
Their clothes are all black
The music is crap
In school I don't concentrate
And sex is kinda fun, but just another one
Of all the empty ways of using up the day
How can I be sure I'm here?
The pills that I've been taking confuse me
I need to know that someone sees that
There's nothing left, I simply am not here
Bipolar disorder
Can't be any boarder
Bipolar disorder
Can't be any boarder
Don’t try to be liked
You don't mind
You feel no sun
You steal a gun
To kill time
You're somewhere
You're no where
You don't care
You catch the breeze
It still relieves
So now where?
. . .
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All the things that I needed
I wasted my chances
I have found myself wanting
When a mother and father
Gave me their problems
I accepted them all
Nothing ever expected
I was rejected
But I came back for more
And my ashes drift beneath the silver sky
Where a boy rides on a bike and never smiles
And my ashes fall over all the things we've said
On a box of photographs under the bed
I will stay in my own world
Under the covers
I will feel safe inside
The kiss that will burn me
Cure me of dreaming
I was always returning
And my ashes find a way beyond the fog
And return to save the child that I forgot
And my ashes fade among the things unseen
And a dream plays in reverse on piano keys
And my ashes drop upon a park in Wales
Never-ending clouds of rain, and distant sails... distant sails
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A good impression of myself
Not much to conceal
I'm saying nothing
But I'm saying nothing revealed
I simply am not here
No way I should appear happy
Stop whining please
Because of who we are
We react in mock surprise
The curse off, there must be more
So don't breathe here
Don't leave your bags
I simply am not here
No way I should appear happy
Stop whining please
The dust in my soul
Makes me feel awake in my legs
My head in the clouds
And I'm zoning out
I'm watching TV
But I find it hard to stay conscious
I'm totally bored
But I can't switch off
Only apathy from the pills in me
Its all in me, all in you
Electricity from the pills in me
Its all in me, all in you
Only eMpTV, cult philosophy
We're lost in the mall
Shuffling through the stores like zombies
What is the point
What can money buy
My hand's on a gun
And I find the range, God, tempt me
What did you say
Think I'm passing out
Only apathy from the pills in me
Its all in me, all in you
Electricity from the pills in me
Its all in me, all in you
Only eMpTV, cult philosophy
All the apathy from the pills in me
Its all in me, all in you
Electricity from the pills in me
Its all in me, all in you
Water so warm that day (water so warm that day)
I counted out the waves (I counted out the waves)
As they broke into
The water so warm that day
I was counting out the waves
And I followed their short life
As they broke on the shoreline
I could see you
But I couldn't hear you
You were holding your hat in the breeze
Turning away from me in this moment
You were stolen as black across the sun
Water so warm that day (water so warm that day)
I counted out the waves (I counted out the waves)
As they broke into shore (as they broke into shore)
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I never want to be old
And I don't want dependants
It's no fun to be told
That you can't blame your parents anymore
I'm finding it hard
To hang from a star
I don't want to be...
Never want to be old
Sullen and bored the kids stay
And in this way wish away each day
Stoned in the mall the kids play
And in this way wish away each day
I don't really know
If I care what is normal
And I'm not really sure
If the pills I've been taking are helping
I've wasted my life
And I'm hurting inside
I don't really know
And I'm not really sure...
Sullen and bored the kids stay
And in this way wish away each day
Stoned in the mall the kids play
And in this way wish away each day
. . .
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Out at the train tracks
I dream of escape
But a song comes onto my iPod
And I realize it's getting late
I can't take the staring
And the sympathy
And I don't like the questions,
"How do you feel? How's it going in school? We know you want to talk about
it..."
Way out, way out of here
Fade out, wait up ahead
And I'm trying to forget you
And I know that I will
In a thousand years
Or maybe a week
Burn all your pictures
Cut out your face
The shutters are down
And the curtains are closed
And I've covered my tracks
Disposed of the car
And I'm trying to forget
Even your name
And the way that you look
When you're sleeping, dreaming of this
Way out, way out of here
Fade out, wait up ahead
Way out, way out of here
Fade out, fade up ahead
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This means out
This is your way out
Do or drown
Do or drown in torpor
Leave no trace
All my files erased
Burn my clothes
Burn my Prada trainers
Let's sleep together right now
Relieve the pressure somehow
Switch off the future right now
Let's leave forever
This is fate
This is your escape
Leave here now
Leave here like it's over
Let's sleep together right now
Relieve the pressure somehow
Switch off the future right now
Let's leave forever
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