MF DOOM Album

Beef rap
Could lead to gettin teeth capped
Or even a wreath for mom dukes on some grief crap
I suggest ya change ya diet
It can lead ta high blood pressure if ya fry it
Or even a stroke, heart attack, heart disease
It ain't no startin back once arteries start ta squeeze
Take the easy way out phony, until then
They know they wouldn't be talkin that bologna in the bullpen
So disgustin, pardon self as I discuss this
They talk a wealth of shit and they ain't never seen the justice
Bust this, like a cold milk from out the toilet
Two batteries some Brillo and some foil, he'a boil it
He be better off on PC glued
And it's a feud so don't be in no TV mood
Every week it's mystery meat, seaweed stewed (food, we need food!)

He wears a mask just to cover the raw flesh
A rather ugly brother with flows that's gorgeous
Drop dead joints hit the whips like bird shit
They need it like a hole in they head or a third tit
Her bra smell, his card say: aw hell
Barred from all bars and kicked out the Carvel'
Keep a cooker where the jar fell
And keep a cheap hooker that's off the hook like Ma Bell
Top bleeding, maybe fella took the loaded rod gears
Stop feeding babies colored sugar-coated lard squares
The odd pairs swears and God fears
Even when it's rotten, we've gotten through the hard years
I wrote this note around New Year's
Off a couple a shots and a few beers, but who cares?
Enough about me, it's about the beats
Not about the streets and who food he about ta eat
A rhymin cannibal who's dressed to kill, it's cynical
Whether is it animal, vegetable, or mineral
It's a miracle how he get so lyrical
And proceed to move the crowd like a old Negro spiritual
For a mil' do a commercial for Mello Yello
Tell 'em devil's hell no, sell y'all own Jello
We hollow krills, she swallow pills
He follow flea collar three dollar bills
And squeal for halal veal, in y'all appeal
Dig the real, it's how the big ballers deal
Twirl a L after every meal (FOOD)

What up
To all rappers shut up with ya shuttin up
And keep your shirt on, at least a button up
Yuck, is they rhymers or strippin males?
Outta work jerks since they shut down Chippendale's
They chippin nails, Doom... jippin scales
Let alone the pre-orders that's counted off shippin sales
This one goes out to all my peoples skippin bail
Dippin jail, whippin tail, and sippin ale
Light the doobie til it glow like a ruby
After which they couldn't find the Villain like Scooby
He's in the lab on some old Buddha Monk shit
Overproof drunk shit, and who'da thunk it?
Punk try an ask why ours be better
It could be the iron mask or the Cosby sweater
Yes, you, who's screwed by the dude on the CD nude (we need food!)

[Beatboxing is heard through the entire song]

[MF Doom]
KEEP YA HOES IN CHECK!(..Super!)
I got this girl and she wants me to duke Her
I told her I'd come scoop her around 8, she said "Super!"
that sounds great, shorty girl's a trooper
no matter what I need her to do, she be like "Super!"
own his own throne, the boss like King Koopa
on the microphone he flossed the ring "Super!
average emcees is like a TV blooper
MF DOOM...hes like D.B. Cooper
out wit the moolah, I let her get a outfit
jus to cool her off she said niggaz ain't about shit
I wonder if she meant it, I doubt it
the way it be in her mouth, she can't live witout it
and can't live with this, handle yo bidness
villain'll stay on a scandalous hoes shit list
one pack of cookies please Mr. Hooper
its fun smackin rookies, he is the "Super!"
look like a black wookie when he let his beard grow
weirdo, brown skin'ded always kept his hair low
rumor has it its a S-curl accident
DOOM was always known to keep the best girls backs bent
some say its the eyes, some say the accent
a lotta guys wonder where they stacks went
I call her thunder thighs, with the fatty swolla
only mess wit high rollas, do what daddy told her
no matter the city she with me to do the thang thang
work in the coochie, hooptie chitty chitty bang bang
same name on the titty as on the name ring
pretty like Baby D off "all in the same gang"
keep my eye on her really don't trust her
but I treat her like a daughter, taught her how to bust a nut
and the heat to turn beef to horsemeat chalupa
teach her how to hold it, of course he is the "Super!"
see most cats treat her like foofer
or beat her to a stupor, take it from the "Super!"
ya need to make her feel cuter
and lay down the G like Luther, everythin'll be "Super!"
do for her, keep her in a new fur
so she look sweet when she go to meet the "Super!"
got the buddha get the Grenadiers, twist it
put it in the air, come 'ere, kiss it
listen here scooter, let her try to bag you
when she's on the rag never let her fry the Ragu
which will have you under some type of spell crying "dag boo"
her name on ya back in her tattoo
whether a bourgie broad, nerd hoe, street chick
don't call her wifey if you met her at the freaknick
you don't want her don't waste her time, I'll dupe her
oh and be a father to ya child like the "Super!"
he keep his hoes in check
sends 'em out to get glows from off frozen necks
tell 'em take his clothes, leave him posin nekkid for real
better yet, get 'em for the check off the record deal
find out where he keep the tek an the blue steel
make sure for extra wreck let 'em know how you feel
and while he's runnin down to all star weekend to ball
I'm comin with the U-HAUL!(Super!)
(..Super!) (...Super!)

(feat. Count Bass-D (Dwight Spits))

[DWIGHT SPITS]
I strive to be humble lest I stumble
Never sold a jumbo or copped chicken with it's mumbo sauce
Tyson is a Fowl holocaust
Fill and gas your whole head up with poetry I'm fed up
Ignore cordon bluh
Stand up get up
Lunge for your knife
Don't forget your potholders

[MF DOOM]
What
These old things
About to throw them away
With the gold rings that make 'em don't fit like O.J
Usually I take them off with oil of ole
MC's is crabs in a barrel pass the old bay
Hot as hell and it's a cold day in it
Working on a way that we roll away tinted
Some say the price of holdin heat is often too high
You either be in a coffin or you be the new guy
The one that's too fly to eat shoe pie
[never too busy]
Never too busy when it comes down to you and I
[Swear to god]
A lot of niggaz wish to die
Need to hold they horses
There's bigger fish to fry
Your on the list
If not hit the number spot
Ten and a half Timbs is made to kick your bumbaclot
Could have had a V-8
F-150 quad cab but I'll be straight
Money comes and goes like that two bit hussy that night that tried to rush me
Dwight pass da dutchie
So I can calm down so they don't get it twisted
Take it from the fire side it wont get blistered
Got it
What happened oh it's not lit
These metal fingers be holding hot shit

[DWIGHT SPITS]
When I was four I pen god was born in new york
Back in seventy seven still got nan in the crescent
The effervescent of gods presence is thick
Unlike vapor
Escarole
extra roll
Word to the baker
Peace to the hard working ginger bread makers
Looked her up and down said hmmmm too much make up
Poor music taste
Ten years from being grown up
Rappers don't blow up heads do
[awwwww shit]
My name is Dwight Spits
I'ma sonic addict
I use to think it was merely a dangling habit
Born under a bad sign
I'm serious about this curse of mine
I strive to flip it in the fine wine
Barely born a virgin is what the stars said
Black not white red all over doe like elmo
Twenty eight years have passed I feel I'm peaking
I make music every weekend
It's a chore
A fact of life
A labor of love
I get mad love but I can test the labor
And it's wages
You know death
I serving life from this gift of god
Don't forget your potholders my niggaz

[MF Doom]
I get no kick from champagne
Their alcohol doesn't thrill me at all
So tell me why shouldn't it be true
I get a kick out of brew

[MF Doom]
There is only one beer left
Rappers screaming all in our ears like we're deaf
Tempt me
Do a number on the label
Eat up all their MC's and drink 'em under the table like
It's on me
Put it on my tab kid
However you get there
Foot it, Cab it, Iron horse it
You leaving on your face forfeit
I crush the mic hold it like the heat he might toss it
Told him tell they stole it
He told her he lost it
She told him get off it, and a bunch other more shit
Getting money
DT's be getting no new leads
It's like he eating watermelon stay spitting new seeds
It's da weed give me some of what he's drooping off
Soon as he wake up choking like it was whooping cough
The group been soft
First hour at the open bar and their trooping off
He went to go laugh and get some head by the side road
She asked him to autograph her dareair
It read to wide load this yard bird taste like fried toad
Turned love villain
Take pride and code words
Crooked eye mold nerd geek with a cold heart
Probably still be speaking in rhymes as an old fart
Study how to eat to dine by the pizza guy
No he's not to fly to skeet in a skezzers eye
And squeeze her thigh
Maybe giver her curves a feel
And the same way she feel it when she flow with nerves of steel
They call him super when they need their back or plumbing fixed
Powers only one left the pack comes in six
Whatever happened to two and three
A hood tried to slide with four and five and got caught
Like what you doing G
Don't make 'em have to get cutting like truancy
Matter fact not for nothing right now you and me
Looser than a pair of adidas
I hope you bought your spare tweeters
MC's sound like cheerleaders
Rapping and dancing like Red Head Kingpin
Dude can't do his thing again no matter how be blinging
You do it for the smelly hubbies
Seeds know what time it is like it's time for tellie tubbies
Few can do it even fewer can sell it
Take it from the dude who wears mask like a tarded helmet
He plots shows like robberies
In and out
One, two, three, no bodies please
Run the cash and you won't get a wet sweatshirt
The mic is the shootie nobody move nobody get hurt
Bring heat like the boy I'm going to war
Came in the door, and everybody on the floor
A whole string of jobs like we are on tour
Everynight on the score coming to your corner store

[Whodini]
Before we go any furthur..FRIENDS!

[MF Doom]
As you call em, they call you when they need somethin
Trees for the blunt 'n, to g's for the frontin
I found a way to get piece of mind for years
And left the hell alone, turn a deaf ear to the cellular phone
Send me a letter, or better, we could see each other in real life
Just so you could feel me like a steel knife
At least so you could see the white of they eyes
Bright wit surprise, once they finish spittin lies
Asssociates, is your boys, your girls, bitches, niggaz, homies?
close, but really don't know me
Mom, dad, comrade, peeps, brothers, sisters, duns, dunnies
Some come around when they need some money
Others make us laugh like the Sunday funnies
Fam be around whether you paid or bummy
You could either ignore this advice, or take it from me
Be too nice and people take you for a dummy
So nowadays he ain't so friendly
Actually they wouldn't even made a worthy enemy
Read the signs: no feeding the baboon
Seein as how they got ya back bleeding from the stab wounds
Ya'll know the dance, they smile in ya face, ya'll know the glance
Try ta put 'em on, they blow the chance
Never let your so-called mans know ya plans
[Whodini:] (How many of us have them?)... a show of hands
[Whodini:] (FRIENDS!)
Is a term some people use loosely
I'm real choosy on what I choose to let crews see
You telling me, I try ta act broke
Jealousy, the number one killer among black folk
Fellas be under some type a spell, like crack smoke
Ghetto cinderellas, lead 'em right to your stack loc
Just another way a chick'll lead to your end
I check the dictionary for the meanin of Friends
It said: Person, one who likes to socialize with
Sympathise and help her, and that's about the size of it
Most of the time these attributes is one-sided
To bolster the crime, they apt to shoot you through your eyelid
And they can't hide it, goin wild like a white bitch
Sometimes ya need to cut niggaz off like a light switch
(Click!) an when things get quiet
Catch 'em like a thief in the night (Bow!) what a riot
I first met Mister Fantastik at a arms deal
Don't let it get drastic, think of how yer moms'll feel
When it get for real, the steel get to sparkin
Everything darken, and ain't no talkin
For somethin so cheap it sure buys a lot of trouble
Ya better off focusing than tryin ta plot the bubble
Or else it'd be a sad note to end on, the guns we got is…
(Whodini: One's we can depend on..FRIENDS!)
Some come in the form of co-dependence
Alotta times only end up bein co-defendants
Ten bucks say they tell for a lower sentence
And leave you up under the jail, beggin for a penance
It don't make no sense, what happened to the loyalty?
Honor amongst crooks, trust amongst royalty
I'd rather go out in a blaze, than give 'em the glory
[Whodini:] (How many of us have-)...a similar story
[Whodini:] (FRIENDS!)
Before lovers we used to have some type of overstanding
Just so when I let her get the man thing, she know its no strings
We could do the damn thing, but hoe its no rings
Just how the tramp swings, will she see 'em again?
That depends on how good was the skins
And could she memorize the lessons, it ain't no need to pretend
Even though she let 'em stab it, she know they just... (friends)

[Whodini: Singing]
FRIENDS! How many of us have them?
FRIENDS! Ones we can depend on?
FRIENDS! How many of us have them?
FRIENDS! Before we go any furthur....

[No lyrics]

[No lyrics]

[No lyrics]

[No lyrics]

[MF Doom]
Darker than the east river
Larger than the Empire State
Where the beats to guard the barbed wire gate
Is on the job not my fate
Tired of the wait to the villain bring deliverance from the dire straits
Fire at a higher rate
Why'd they make the liars
Fliers scatter
Buy a plate
Isolate the wires
Try the straight pliers if not the vise grips
A real price saver way to acquire nice whips
What a steal for real on wheels of steel
Stunner a funner summer number one meal deal bummer
A bizarre phenomenon is your armor on
Take ya cash coma or break ya fast Ramadan
Trons action drama awww come on barney
Clack clack pardon me wack rap Kon Karne
He came to feed the childrens like Sally Strothers
After that he's going back to cali where's da

[love is]

Wilder than the nile
Old power like the great pyramids of giza
And stay leanin like the tower of pisa
Give him something he can feel that's off the squeeza
Raw with the pen and on the mic off the hezza
Get shot off that wide eye talk
If he had a pot he'd still piss on the sidewalk
Can't take the street out the street person
Looking for the perfect beat co worsen into heat bursting
They couldn't spot him on the spot date
Got the only tape that comes with a free hot plate
Whoever do get to see me sing
With the 3-D ring sittin stationary like B.B. King
Can see how it really sting
It ain't no front row
Standing room only at the motorcross stunt show
The ruckus ain't up to snuffiluffigus me and Sub is like the brown Smothers Brothers

Faster than the seven seas
Bigger than mount kilimanjaro
If they don't know fill them in tomorrow
And the horror show
I'm into no return bars regularly
Swear to god before he gets a job he robs head hurt
Blessed with a hot flow
Tested and got doe
Invested and stressed the best to finest an opto
As I reminisce never forgot when I was very broke
Shot the henny straight couldn't afford to cop the cherry coke
Or should I say broke with wealth
To know enough to give them just rope to yoke they self
Playin me before I take the ring and pawn it
The long arm of the law couldn't even put they fingers on it
Dog on it
Do the statistics
How he bust lyrics was to futuristic for ballistics
And far to eccentric for forensics
I dedicate this mix to Subroc the Hip Hop Hendrix

(feat. 4ize, Angelika)

[Angelika]
...shayton never came so ill, he got skill
Met a brother from the drill that gave my spine chills
All.. thirty three nerves controllin my curves
Common sense just swerved everytime I got served
Stress, frustration, empty rhetoric
Cold as winter in conneticut
Compassion lackin deficit
Thought it was love life, sent from above
You not a soulmate
More ways and actions of a crimate
Who by low and census comin faker than extentions
Pistol way offed in intentions outta here sister was missin
Intuition baby it was me I couldn't see
Holdin onto fantasy, gettin bit by reality

[Chorus: 4ize] [Singing]
War wound, purple heart, love veteran
Morphine, pain killers, drugs and medicine
Anything just to forget the hurt, INCOMING...
Take cover hit the dirt
On the frontline, there's casualities in the mind
And the POW's get left behind
Mentally scarred for life, love is war
And some chics are just too hard to wife

[Angelika]
I should've debtted it from Genisis
Instead of hittin them Guinnessez
Now I'm free fallin cursin at the street brawlin
He cease callin, no appetite for free stallin
So deep all in, I bet he never stop ballin
Women, forsake God for the scent of a man
Sacrifice I hold life for a slice, overstand?
Maybe it's a lack of pigment
Loneliness imagine figment
Ownly got the car tinted to pull extra G's in it
Damn Jody, comin with the okie doke, pokie poke
Steady rockin boats, got me aimin for ya throats
Sniper scope, weren't we supposed to elope?
Propose then ya froze, I don't think that I can cope

[Chorus: 4ize] [Singing]
War wound, purple heart, love veteran
Morphine, pain killers, drugs and medicine
Anything just to forget the hurt, INCOMING...
Take cover hit the dirt
On the frontline, there's casualities in the mind
And the POW's get left behind
Mentally scarred for life, love is war
And some chics are just too hard to wife

[Angelika]
Constant frustration, stemmin from a no win situation
Rushin lust and fornication, adding to the complication
Patience is a virtue, pain run deep with love desert you
Listenin to wisperin, choosin chaos over discipline
Simpleton, life should really be a piece of intimance
Relationships swiftin in
Flower essence: penstemon
Gentlemen, my favorite shit, so I never forsaken it
I presevere, make it fit, sculptin and reshapin it
Takin sips off a fifth and IF passion it
Inscense in sits candles lit, scandalous
Emotional bandages, why would he abandon us?
Guess he couldn't handle it, the boss is magnanimous

[Chorus: 4ize] [Singing]
War wound, purple heart, love veteran
Morphine, pain killers, drugs and medicine
Anything just to forget the hurt, INCOMING...
Take cover hit the dirt
On the frontline, there's casualities in the mind
And the POW's get left behind
Mentally scarred for life, love is war
And some chics are just too hard to wife

[MF Doom]
...Give it a sec for the pain to start
This wreck right here it ain't for the faint of heart
They thought they saw the worst verse
From the team of G men who seem like nerds at first
Once they get to know us people dig us
Leaders in the fight for equal rights for niggaz
Inventor of the more demented flow nobody doubt it
This go for if ya bout it bout it or rowdy rowdy
Whatevers clever the master fold
Who every hooka heard a but now HO NO
If we see tomorrow the next day classes
The villain in the back with the x-ray glasses [Pause]
Have no fear the ninja here
Feel em like the tinge in ya ear from drinkin ginger beer
When it's on loco head gon' lay low
And heat it like beef patty coco bread con queso
If you say so lace the whole case load
They say he wear a metal mask in case his face show
He told em they flows is bitch talk and ayo's
His whole crew walk with pitchfork and halo's
Say OH if you never worked a J-O
And keep more cash then a stash in a peso
Okay yo ya'll know who to follow
Tie em up in the crib and leave the place hollow
..Oh shoot the goose shes loose
So wild you couldnt chase it down with straight fruit juice
Frown like the first time you taste cous cous
Stash the deuce deuce
Troops askin truce truce
Today on intense wreck week
We have the super villain in his own defense to speak
It's all part of my mental techniques
Available to freaks and pencil neck geeks
Train the same brain to a insane train of thought
On a campaign trail he came to gain ya support
Charge cash for a autograph
Say some shit to make ya daughta laugh
Then slaughta the ass
Seem em on the big screen like Steve McQueen
Do something and never be back once he leave the scene
Keep more medicated pads then Stridex
For his own sidewrecks with no known side effects
Before you press charges use ya noodle
So what when he grab the mic he scratch ya cute cuticles
Keep ya mouth shut everything'll be beautiful
It would be often rude to you now get back to ya hooty hoo
Damnit it ain't worth the drama can it
From the calm bandit eat rhymers like pomegranate
Soon as he stepped in he lit the room
Boom reschedule my noon with Britt Hume (Doom!)
In love with Mary Jane she's my main thing
Pulled her right from that webhead what a lame brain
Maintain say it dont spray it
Wanna see ya girl again ya might as well pay it
If I had a dime for every rhymer who bust guns
I'll have a cool mill for my sons in trust funds
When I was broker than a broke dick dog
I always kept a L to smoke in thick fog
When it rain it sure do thunderstorm
I got more rhymes in the summer than musty underarms
One two microphone checker
First learned to neck off a Home-Ec homewrecker
This is back when he was like crib age
When he hit the stage its like a gauge to the rib cage
Break the mic like a rock star break a guitar
Jump off the stage like "Yee haw!"

(feat. Mr. Fantastik)

[Mr. Fantastik: Talking]
Yo..

[MF Doom: Talking]
Yo

[Mr. Fantastik: Talking]
MF Doom

[MF Doom: Talking]
Mr. Fantastik

[Mr. Fantastik: Talking]
Mr. Fantastik

[MF Doom: Talking]
The villain

[Mr. Fantastik: Talking]
What up, nigga?

[MF Doom: Talking]
Ain't nuttin, what's the word?

[Mr. Fantastik: Talking]
What's cracking, boy?

[MF Doom: Talking]
Same ol' shit, kid

[Mr. Fantastik: Talking]
Man..rap snitches man..shit is bugged out, man, the fuck man

[MF Doom: Talking]
You telling me

[Mr. Fantastik: Talking]
Niggaz running their mouth, telling anything, anything!

[Chorus x2: Mr. Fantastik]
Rap snitches, tellin all their business
Sit in the court and be they own star witness
Do you see the perpetrator, yeah I'm right here
Fuck around and get the whole label sent up for years (Huh)

[Mr. Fantastik]
Type profile low, like ay get paid in full
Attract heavy cash cuz the game's centrifical
Mister Fantastik long though like elastic
Got my life between glocks, it's made out of plastic
Can't stand the brown nosin nigga fake ass bastard
Admiring my style so I bust through Manhattan
Since plottin, plan the quickest, my flow is the sickest
My hoes be the thickest, my dro.. the stickiest
Street nigga, stamped and bonafide
When beef jump niggaz come get me cuz they know I ride
Two to the ski mask, New York's my origin
Play a fake gangsta like a old accordian
Accordin ta him, when the deed's rushed in
Complication from the wild testimony was thin
Caused his man ta go up north, the ball hit 'em again
Blame rap snitch nigga, even told on the mexican
[Chorus x2: Mr. Fantastik] [The second time the chorus is repeated, it doesn't end with "Huh"]
Rap snitches, tellin all their business
Sit in the court and be they own star witness
Do you see the perpetrator, yeah i'm right here
Fuck around get the whole label sent up for years (Huh)

[MF Doom]
True, there's rules to this shit, fools dare care
Everybody wanna rule the world with tears for fear
Yeah yeah tell 'em tell it on the mountain hill
Runnin up they mouth bill, everybody doubtin still
Informer, keep it up and get tested
Pop through the bubble vest or double breasted
He keep a lab down south in the little beast
So much heat you woulda thought it was the middle east
A little grease always keeps the wheels a spinnin
Like sittin on twenty threes to get the squeelers grinnin
Hittin on many trees, feel real linen
Spittin on enemies, get the steel for tin men
Where no brains but gum flap
He said his gun clap, then he fled after one slap
(Pat!) son shut your trap, save it for the bitches
MMM...delicious, rap snitch knishes

[Mr. Fantastik: Talking]
You know what I'm saying? It's a terrible-crazy, man
Just analyzing this all game, it's bugged out
Niggaz snitching..telling on them allselves

[MF Doom: Talking]
It's a horror, man..

[Mr. Fantastik: Talking]
Fuck around..and get anybody bagged, man..
Fuck around and get yo mama bagged, nigga..
You know your grandmama begging..fake hustling nigga
[Laughter]

IT's the beat
He hear it in his sleep sometime
Blare it in your jeep so your peoples can stare at them rhymes
Real rhymes not your everyday hologram
Even when ribs were touchin never swallowed the Ham
He'd rather eat a sand sandwich salad
It might need salt like your mans bland ballad
A lot of stuff happens that the news won't tell yous
Loose all L juice
Snooze all hell loose
Rake it
Take it like the good, the bad, the ugly
Break it rollin through ya hood in the cadi buggy
Butter softy, leather flossy, fatty juggy
Always threw me off when she told me daddy funk me
I'm like anywho's
Seeds walkin all out in street with out any shoes
I guess it's better than some funky socks
You need to get her some skips before she catch the monkey pocks
Instead she wants to hear the beatbox
Take pills and make fake krills as sheetrock
Sing it
Bring it back to your laboratory
While he's in his oratory
Glorious like a horror story
The mask is like Jason
They told the place not to let the basket type case in
He could be some kind of wacko
Waiting for the chance to heat the pipes like a crack hoe
He busted in
Blessed be the lord
Who believe any mess then read up on the message board
If so I got bridges for the low low
Same bitch a go dry snitchin to the popo
Yeah orange peal stoges for the hotel
Feel like I have been gone over a year came home to old gear
It was the shit when I first scooped it
At least I get to sit out in New York and curse stupid
Plead the fifth
Sip wine stiffly
Patiently come up and be spiffy in a jiffy
Gift for the grind
Criminal mind shifty
Swift with the nine through a fifty nine fifty
Well edjumacated he heard it when he meditated
In deep data had her hate the create plata
Dedicated cheap skata who keeps data
Sage stayed self medicated and sleep later
Side effects is similar to sugar pill
Who eva go next on the mic he put a bugger ewwww
And made his exit on some calm shit
Begged him on the regular for kegs of more Vomitspit

[MF Doom]
One lonely evening alone home
End up with carpal tunnel syndrome
Here I am don't forget the heavy back aches
Grown and living off of little Debbie snack cakes
Supposed to be checking e-mails
All I got is messages from ass naked females

Kookies

I don't know no jenny she said its free and I wont owe her a penny
And that's the last time I saw her
But thousands of more horror and on-line Gomorra
And Sodom
They got 'em with they curls out
And they got a better sales pitch then the girl scouts
I wonder what I owe her
For a whole box of caramel coconut samoa

Nite nite

Ok honey sweet dreams now it gets very serious like peach creams
A metal hand filled squish it on the quilt
Misses wakes up and I'm killed over spilled milk
Locked in looking at your picture
Fully clothed winter and I right there wit cha
Thinking about the last time I split your wishbone
A man could only wish you could do the same till he get home
Fat chance
At least he got snacks
Better have the due till a brother get back
Till then smack when I jack
I hope wanna hit peoples kookies with a fried pack
That's three different flavors
Chocolate, vanilla, and strawberry wafers
He acting all hard bout to get beat up
I'll show him what time it is once I get his feet up
As soon as he fell off his beat down all I hear is
Thirteenth cell put the sheet down
Damn C.O.
What the hell do she know
Besides the fact that she wants her back dug out on the d-low
A workaholic with a fountain in the ink pen
House in the mountains and he stop drinking again
In the wee hours he's gotten farther
Maybe three showers getting hot and bothered
The wiz with her legs bent pregnant
God blessed the dick she wondered where her egg went
He got to hell but it's hard to drink with out it
And could use some kookies but trying not to think about it
Watch him bet on jazz from knowledge on file
Every other commercial college hoes gone wild
Soft batch he prefer the other bunch like they got for lunch
Chocolate fudge butter crunch

Don't mess with the ritz bitz, wheat thins, saltine triskits
Motts so's and cheese its
Catch sugar fits every time he sees a nice pair of
Chips ahoy double chocolate chunk
Something with the bubble and the junk in the trunk
Even the oreo
No matter what the weather
Always kept dipped in milk and stuck together
In the game he's shameless even uses a code name Famous Amos
Cheaper than a short stay at the day's inn and good like 25 cent oatmeal raisin
Give it up to who invented the camera
Never mind the ginger bread men and the grandma's
Make sure she don't wake from her dream
Killer get caught with a hand full of cream filled

Kookies

It might seem ill

[MF Doom]
Smack it up, flip it, pulled out, 'bout to fail
Sunday in the A-T-L and I'm all outta ale
Like a bat out of hell, tripped on a cat tail
Mutt drinkin out a pail, who let the rat out the cell?
Got all the ingredients and recipe, might as well
Since last week the bootlegger been in jail
If all else fail, inhale the ale
Makin sure they can't see your sale via snail mail
Mind like a sewer, servin rhyme on a skewer
Doom'll step to a fine dime like he knew her
My black sister, she said "Step back" before he kissed her
She did the dipper and the smack just missed her
There go a list of politics like Henry Kissinger
99% of rap is just a friendly issue to
I'm like these dudes must have some screws loose to hate y'all
Or a couple of ounces short of deuce-deuce or 8 Ball
Y'all know it's time for the end, when the day come
Buy an album, get rudely insulted over fake drums
Same CD's you get for free, you break 'em
Wa-alaikum, make 'em eat they food like steak'um
Why she wanna ask me if I could pass the paparika?
One hand on the mic, the other on the beaker
Every week or so peaked out the lab though, eureka
A technique to keep somethin uniquer in your speaker
For yo' information, I didn't do the beat y'all
It ain't my fault, if she didn't move her feet at all
Skeeter, got Peter to pay Paul
So you can drink it on Mary so she can play ball
... So let her have my scrilla
And cut it out with all that funny hand jive will ya?
All this trouble for a tall glass of Olde E
Drink it all fast, make you haul ass slowly
And rhymin to remember what you told me
Holey moley, did you get a load of her roley poley?
Yo G, remind me to remember what you told me
Whoever don't feel him build walls like a goalie
One for the money, two for the better green
Three for methanine-dioxymethamphetamine
Told the knock kneed ghetto queen get the head fiend
Tell him it's for Medallin and use oxcyocetaline
Who needs airplay, it's all just hearsay
Leave a wig like it was havin a bad hair day
Miracle glide master, asked him what's his secret
He said Shasta, and turned to formaldehyde faster
When I'm home with my lady, I try to duke her daily
One night she tried to flail me with her ukelele
Pack your heat, the Villain on the cover of Black Beat
With a bunch of crackers and some snack meat
... You better have my scrilla
Cut it out with all that funny hand jive will ya?
All this trouble for a tall glass of Olde E
Drink it all fast, make you haul ass slowly
Remind me to remember what you told me
Holey moley, did you get a load of her roley poley?
Yo G, remind me to remember what you told me
And if you don't feel him build walls like a goalie