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"Ten Years in an Open Neck Shirt, Part 2" lyrics |
 Where were we in the uh...
Not tour-de-force I call an autobiography?
Ah yes, I think we were up to "poverty" weren't we?
He was delivered to the Eros Luxury Club, right, in the bowels of the Manchester sub-terrain.
Well, his complete barbar..., his complete reversion to barbarism was prevented when he was adopted by Sheba and Rex who were a pair of Alsatians.
Who started life as Christmas presents to be abandoned by for roller skates
And, they took him home
Home being an art-deco cocktail cabinet on a wooly range bomb site
Decadent lot, you know what I mean.
See like, you know, that's why I know things like mass aldusia
'Cause I've had, you know, a tasteful upbringing.
You know, you've heard about a tasteful upbringing.
You know about these standard things as well.
Which I don't blame you.
I look forward to a time when all you low life peasants are equal to the likes of me.
But I haven't always had it, I haven't always had it easy as you will hear in the ensuing paragraph.
Discarded chips and chewing gum were the day-to-day diet of the sub-savage dog boy.
Whose reversion to a pathetic barbarism was prevented only by the spiritual guidance of Sheba and Rex who were devout Catholics.
Four years later, it was arranged for him to attend the School of Our Lady of the Seven Robes of Gold by the Garden of Sorrows in the Vale of Tears.
School motto: "Behold, his precious blood".
It was run with Spartan efficiency by the little daughters of the sick under the benevolent tyranny of Sister Scourge.
Sister Scourge was everything in the world that stank to Jack.
The hideous rip in her malevolent mask she called a face.
Her cheesy breath steaming up his glasses.
Her eyes like prickly ball bearings - leaving a mechanical taste in the mouth.
"How do you feel?" asked Sister Scourge.
And Otto replied, in his native tongue, "Ruff".
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