We've been dating since high school, we never once left this town
We used to go out on the weekends and we'd drink 'til we drowned
But now, she's acting funny and I don't understand
I think that she's found her some other man
(Chorus)
She left me for Jesus and that just ain't fair
She says that He's perfect, how could I compare
She says I should find Him and I'll know peace, at last
If I ever find Jesus, I'm kicking His ass
She showed me a picture, all I could do was stare
At that freak in His sandals with His long pretty hair
They must think that I'm stupid or, I don't have a clue
I'll bet He's a commie or, even worse yet, a Jew
Chorus
She's given up whiskey and taken up wine
While she prays for His troubles, has forgot about mine
I'm gonna get even, I can't handle the shame
Why, last time we made love, she even called out His name
Chorus
It could have been Carlos or, even Billy Ortez
But, if I ever find Jesus, He's gonna wish He were dead
Amen
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