Eminem Album

[Eminem]
May I have your attention please?
May I have your attention please?
Will the real Slim Shady please stand up?
I repeat, will the real Slim Shady please stand up?
We're gonna have a problem here..

Y'all act like you never seen a white person before
Jaws all on the floor like Pam, like Tommy just burst in the door
and started whoopin her ass worse than before
they first were divorce, throwin her over furniture (Ahh!)
It's the return of the... "Ah, wait, no way, you're kidding,
he didn't just say what I think he did, did he?"
And Dr. Dre said... nothing you idiots!
Dr. Dre's dead, he's locked in my basement! (Ha-ha!)
Feminist women love Eminem
[*vocal turntable: chigga chigga chigga*]
"Slim Shady, I'm sick of him
Look at him, walkin around grabbin his you-know-what
Flippin the you-know-who," "Yeah, but he's so cute though!"
Yeah, I probably got a couple of screws up in my head loose
But no worse, than what's goin on in your parents' bedrooms
Sometimes, I wanna get on TV and just let loose, but can't
but it's cool for Tom Green to hump a dead moose
"My bum is on your lips, my bum is on your lips"
And if I'm lucky, you might just give it a little kiss
And that's the message that we deliver to little kids
And expect them not to know what a woman's clitoris is
Of course they gonna know what intercourse is
By the time they hit fourth grade
They got the Discovery Channel don't they?
"We ain't nothing but mammals.." Well, some of us cannibals
who cut other people open like cantaloupes [*SLURP*]
But if we can hump dead animals and antelopes
then there's no reason that a man and another man can't elope
[*EWWW!*] But if you feel like I feel, I got the antidote
Women wave your pantyhose, sing the chorus and it goes

[Chorus: Eminem (repeat 2X)]

I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up,
please stand up, please stand up?

[Eminem]
Will Smith don't gotta cuss in his raps to sell his records;
well I do, so fuck him and fuck you too!
You think I give a damn about a Grammy?
Half of you critics can't even stomach me, let alone stand me
"But Slim, what if you win, wouldn't it be weird?"
Why? So you guys could just lie to get me here?
So you can, sit me here next to Britney Spears?
Shit, Christina Aguilera better switch me chairs
so I can sit next to Carson Daly and Fred Durst
and hear 'em argue over who she gave head to first
You little bitch, put me on blast on MTV
"Yeah, he's cute, but I think he's married to Kim, hee-hee!"
I should download her audio on MP3
and show the whole world how you gave Eminem VD [*AHHH!*]
I'm sick of you little girl and boy groups, all you do is annoy me
so I have been sent here to destroy you [*bzzzt*]
And there's a million of us just like me
who cuss like me; who just don't give a fuck like me
who dress like me; walk, talk and act like me
and just might be the next best thing but not quite me!

[Chorus]

[Eminem]
I'm like a head trip to listen to, cause I'm only givin you
things you joke about with your friends inside your living room
The only difference is I got the balls to say it
in front of y'all and I don't gotta be false or sugarcoated at all
I just get on the mic and spit it
and whether you like to admit it [*ERR*] I just shit it
better than ninety percent of you rappers out can
Then you wonder how can kids eat up these albums like valiums
It's funny; cause at the rate I'm goin when I'm thirty
I'll be the only person in the nursin home flirting
Pinchin nurses asses when I'm jackin off with Jergens
And I'm jerkin but this whole bag of Viagra isn't working
And every single person is a Slim Shady lurkin
He could be workin at Burger King, spittin on your onion rings
[*HACH*] Or in the parkin lot, circling
Screaming "I don't give a fuck!"
with his windows down and his system up
So, will the real Shady please stand up?
And put one of those fingers on each hand up?
And be proud to be outta your mind and outta control
and one more time, loud as you can, how does it go?

[Chorus 2X]

[Eminem]
Ha ha
Guess there's a Slim Shady in all of us
Fuck it, let's all stand up

[sound of static]

[announcer]
Meet Eddie, twenty-three years old.
Fed up with life and the way things are going,
he decides to rob a liquor store.
("I can't take this no more, I can't take it no more homes")
But on his way in, he has a sudden change of heart.
And suddenly, his conscience comes into play...
("Shit is mine, I gotta do this.. gotta do this")

[Dr. Dre]
Alright, stop! (Huh?)
Now before you walk in the door of this liquor store
and try to get money out the drawer
You better think of the consequence (But who are you?)
I'm your motherfuckin conscience

[Eminem]
That's nonsense!
Go in and gaffle the money and run to one of your aunt's cribs
And borrow a damn dress, and one of her blonde wigs
Tell her you need a place to stay
You'll be safe for days if you shave your legs with an aged razor blade

[Dr. Dre]
Yeah but if it all goes through like it's supposed to
The whole neighborhood knows you and they'll expose you
Think about it before you walk in the door first
Look at the store clerk, she's older than George Burns

[Eminem]
Fuck that! Do that shit! Shoot that bitch!
Can you afford to blow this shit? Are you that rich?
Why you give a fuck if she dies? Are you that bitch?
Do you really think she gives a fuck if you have kids?

[Dr. Dre]
Man, don't do it, it's not worth it to risk it! (You're right!)
Not over this shit (Stop!) Drop the biscuit (I will!)
Don't even listen to Slim yo, he's bad for you
(You know what Dre? I don't like your attitude..)

[sound of static]

("It's alright c'mon, just come in here for a minute")
("Mmm, I don't know!")
("Look baby..")
("Damn!")
("Yo, it's gonna be alright, right?")
("Well OK..")

[announcer]
Meet Stan, twenty-one years old. ("Give me a kiss!")
After meeting a young girl at a rave party,
things start getting hot and heavy in an upstairs bedroom.
Once again, his conscience comes into play... ("Shit!")

[Eminem]
Now listen to me, while you're kissin her cheek
and smearin her lipstick, I slipped this in her drink
Now all you gotta do is nibble on this little bitch's earlobe..
(Yo! This girl's only fifteen years old
You shouldn't take advantage of her, that's not fair)
Yo, look at her bush.. does it got hair? (Uh huh!)
Fuck this bitch right here on the spot bare
Til she passes out and she forgot how she got there
(Man, ain't you ever seen that one movie _Kids_?)
No, but I seen the porno with SunDoobiest!
(Shit, you wanna get hauled off to jail?)
Man fuck that, hit that shit raw dawg and bail..

[sound of static]
[pickup idling, radio playing]

[announcer]
Meet Grady, a twenty-nine year old construction worker.
After coming home from a hard day's work,
he walks in the door of his trailer park home
to find his wife in bed with another man.
("WHAT THE FUCK?!?!")
("Grady!!")

[Dr. Dre]
Alright calm down, relax, start breathin..

[Eminem]
Fuck that shit, you just caught this bitch cheatin
While you at work she's with some dude tryin to get off?!
FUCK slittin her throat, CUT THIS BITCH'S HEAD OFF!!!

[Dr. Dre]
Wait! What if there's an explanation for this shit?
(What? She tripped? Fell? Landed on his dick?!)
Alright Shady, maybe he's right Grady
But think about the baby before you get all crazy

[Eminem]
Okay! Thought about it, still wanna stab her?
Grab her by the throat, get your daughter and kidnap her?
That's what I did, be smart, don't be a retard
You gonna take advice from somebody who slapped DEE BARNES??!

[Dr. Dre]
What'chu say? (What's wrong? Didn't think I'd remember?)
I'ma kill you motherfucker!

[Eminem]
Uhhh-aahh! Temper temper!
Mr. Dre? Mr. N.W.A.?
Mr. AK comin' straight outta Compton y'all better make way?
How in the fuck you gonna tell this man not to be violent?

[Dr. Dre]
Cause he don't need to go the same route that I went
Been there, done that.. aw fuck it...
What am I sayin? Shoot em both Grady, where's your gun at?

[gun fires, is cocked, and re-fired]

[Eminem]
A lot of people ask me.. stupid fuckin questions
A lot of people think that.. what I say on records
or what I talk about on a record, that I actually do in real life
or that I believe in it
Or if I say that, I wanna kill somebody, that..
I'm actually gonna do it
or that I believe in it
Well, shit.. if you believe that
then I'll kill you
You know why?
Cuz I'm a

CRIMINAL
CRIMINAL
You god damn right
I'm a CRIMINAL
Yeah, I'm a CRIMINAL

[Eminem]
My words are like a dagger with a jagged edge
That'll stab you in the head
whether you're a fag or lez
Or the homosex, hermaph or a trans-a-vest
Pants or dress - hate fags? The answer's "yes"
Homophobic? Nah, you're just heterophobic
Starin at my jeans, watchin my genitals bulgin (Ooh!)
That's my motherfuckin balls, you'd better let go of em
They belong in my scrotum, you'll never get hold of em
Hey, it's me, Versace
Whoops, somebody shot me!
And I was just checkin the mail
Get it? Checkin the 'male'?
How many records you expectin to sell
after your second LP sends you directly to jail?
C'mon!-- Relax guy, I like gay men
Right, Ken? Give me an amen (AAA-men!)
Please Lord, this boy needs Jesus
Heal this child, help us destroy these demons
Oh, and please send me a brand new car
And a prostitute while my wife's sick in the hospital
Preacher preacher, fifth grade teacher
You can't reach me, my mom can't neither
You can't teach me a goddamn thing cause
I watch TV, and Comcast cable
and you ain't able to stop these thoughts
You can't stop me from toppin these charts
And you can't stop me from droppin each March
with a brand new cd for these fuckin retards
Duhhh, and to think, it's just little ol' me
Mr. "Don't Give A Fuck," still won't leave

[Chorus: Eminem (repeat 2X)]

I'm a CRIMINAL
Cuz every time I write a rhyme, these people think it's a crime
to tell em what's on my mind - I guess I'm a CRIMINAL
but I don't gotta say a word, I just flip em the bird
and keep goin, I don't take shit from no one

[Eminem]
My mother did drugs - tar, liquor, cigarettes, and speed
The baby came out - disfigured, ligaments indeed
It was a seed who would grow up just as crazy as she
Don't dare make fun of that baby cause that baby was me
I'm a CRIMINAL - an animal caged who turned crazed
But how the fuck you sposed to grow up when you weren't raised?
So as I got older and I got a lot taller
My dick shrunk smaller, but my balls got larger
I drink malt liquor to fuck you up quicker
than you'd wanna fuck me up for sayin the word nigga
My morals went thhbbpp when the president got oral
Sex in his Oval Office on top of his desk
Off of his own employee
Now don't ignore me, you won't avoid me
You can't miss me, I'm white, blonde-haired
and my nose is pointy
I'm the bad guy who makes fun of people that die
in plane crashes and laughs
As long as it ain't happened to him
Slim Shady, I'm as crazy as Em
-inem and Kim combined - [*kch*] the maniac's in
Replacin the doctor cause Dre couldn't make it today
He's a little under the weather, so I'm takin his place
(Mm-mm-mmm!) Oh, that's Dre with an AK to his face
Don't make me kill him too and spray his brains all over the place
I told you Dre, you should've kept that thang put away
I guess that'll teach you not to let me play with it, eh?
I'm a CRIMINAL

[Interlude Skit]
Aight look (uh huh) just go up in that motherfucker
get the motherfuckin money and get the fuck up outta there
[Em] Aight
I'll be right here waitin on you
[Em] Aight
Yo Em
[Em] What?!
Don't kill nobody this time
[Em] Awwright... god damn, fuck...
(whistling) how you doin'?
[Teller] HI, how can I help you?
[Eminem] Yeah I need to make a withdrawl
[Teller] Okay
[Eminem] Put the fuckin money in the bag bitch
and I won't kill you!
[Teller] What? Oh my god, don't kill me
[Eminem] I'm not gonna kill you bitch, quit lookin around...
[Teller] Don't kill me, please don't kill me...
[Eminem] I said I'm not gonna fuckin kill you
Hurry the fuck up! [*BOOM*] Thank you!

[Eminem]
Windows tinted on my ride when I drive in it
So when I rob a bank, run out and just dive in it
So I'll be disguised in it
And if anybody identifies the guy in it
I'll hide for five minutes
Come back, shoot the eyewitness
Fire at the private eye hired to pry in my business
Die, bitches, bastards, brats, pets
This puppy's lucky I didn't blast his ass yet [*dog whines*]
If I ever gave a fuck, I'd shave my nuts
tuck my dick inbetween my legs and cluck
You motherfuckin chickens ain't brave enough
to say the stuff I say, so just tape it shut [*tape unrolls*]
Shit, half the shit I say, I just make it up
To make you mad so kiss my white naked ass
And if it's not a rapper that I make it as
I'ma be a fuckin rapist in a Jason mask

[Chorus 2X]


[thanks to kevin.toner@blueyonder.co.uk for correcting these lyrics]

[Chorus: repeat 2X]

Hi! My name is.. (what?) My name is.. (who?)
My name is.. [scratches] Slim Shady
Hi! My name is.. (huh?) My name is.. (what?)
My name is.. [scratches] Slim Shady

Ahem.. excuse me!
Can I have the attention of the class
for one second?

[Eminem]
Hi kids! Do you like violence? (Yeah yeah yeah!)
Wanna see me stick Nine Inch Nails through each one of my eyelids? (Uh-huh!)
Wanna copy me and do exactly like I did? (Yeah yeah!)
Try 'cid and get fucked up worse that my life is? (Huh?)
My brain's dead weight, I'm tryin to get my head straight
but I can't figure out which Spice Girl I want to impregnate (Ummmm..)
And Dr. Dre said, "Slim Shady you a basehead!"
Uh-uhhh! "So why's your face red? Man you wasted!"
Well since age twelve, I've felt like I'm someone else
Cause I hung my original self from the top bunk with a belt
Got pissed off and ripped Pamela Lee's tits off
And smacked her so hard I knocked her clothes backwards like Kris Kross
I smoke a fat pound of grass and fall on my ass
faster than a fat bitch who sat down too fast
C'mere slut! (Shady, wait a minute, that's my girl dog!)
I don't give a fuck, God sent me to piss the world off!

[Chorus]

[Eminem]
My English teacher wanted to flunk me in junior high
Thanks a lot, next semester I'll be thirty-five
I smacked him in his face with an eraser, chased him with a stapler
and stapled his nuts to a stack of papers (Owwwwwwww!)
Walked in the strip club, had my jacket zipped up
Flashed the bartender, then stuck my dick in the tip cup
Extraterrestrial, runnin over pedestrians
in a spaceship while they screamin at me: "LET'S JUST BE FRIENDS!"
Ninety-nine percent of my life I was lied to
I just found out my mom does more dope than I do (Damn!)
I told her I'd grow up to be a famous rapper
Make a record about doin drugs and name it after her (Oh thank you!)
You know you blew up when the women rush your stands
and try to touch your hands like some screamin Usher fans (Aaahhhhhh!)
This guy at White Castle asked for my autograph
(Dude, can I get your autograph?)
So I signed it: 'Dear Dave, thanks for the support, ASSHOLE!'

[Chorus]

[Eminem]
Stop the tape! This kid needs to be locked away! (Get him!)
Dr. Dre, don't just stand there, OPERATE!
I'm not ready to leave, it's too scary to die (Fuck that!)
I'll have to be carried inside the cemetery and buried alive
(Huh yup!) Am I comin or goin? I can barely decide
I just drank a fifth of vodka -- dare me to drive? (Go ahead)
All my life I was very deprived
I ain't had a woman in years, and my palms are too hairy to hide
(Whoops!) Clothes ripped like the Incredible Hulk (hachhh-too)
I spit when I talk, I'll fuck anything that walks (C'mere)
When I was little I used to get so hungry I would throw fits
HOW YOU GONNA BREAST FEED ME MOM? (WAH!)
YOU AIN'T GOT NO TITS! (WAHHH!)
I lay awake and strap myself in the bed
Put a bulleproof vest on and shoot myself in the head (BANG!)
I'm steamin mad (Arrrggghhh!)
And by the way when you see my dad? (Yeah?)
Tell him that I slit his throat, in this dream I had

[Chorus]

[Eminem]
Hi!
Original Bad Boy on the case, cover your face
Came in the place blowed, and sprayed Puffy with Mase
I laced the weed with insect repellant, better check the smelly
Eminem starts with E, better check the spelling
with a capital, somebody grab me a Snapple
I got an aspirin capsule trapped in my adam's apple (hurry up!)
Somebody dropped me on my head, and I was sure
that my mother did it, but the bitch won't admit it was her
I slit her stomach open with a scalpel when she was six months
and said, "I'm ready now bitch - ain't you feelin these kicks cunt?"
The world ain't ready for me yet, I can tell
I'll probably have a cell next to the furnace in hell
I'm sicker than sperm cells with syphillis germs
and I'm hotter than my dick is, when I piss and it burns
I kick you in the tummy until you sick to your stomach
and vomit so much blood that your clothes stick to you from it (yuck!)
(Yuck!) Hit you in the head with a brick til you plummet
If y'all don't like me, you can suck my dick til you numb it
And all that gibberish you was spittin, you need to kill it
Cause your style is like dyin in my sleep, I don't feel it

[Chorus: Eminem]

Cause any man who would jump in front of a minivan
for twenty grand and a bottle of pain pills and a minithin
is fuckin crazy -- you hear me? Ha?
Is fuckin crazy -- hello, hi!
Cause any man who would jump in front of a minivan
for twenty grand and a bottle of pain pills and a minithin
is fuckin crazy -- do you hear me?
Is fuckin crazy

[Eminem]
I'm ice grillin you, starin you down with a gremlin grin
I'm Eminem, you're a fag in a women's gym
I'm Slim, the Shady is really a fake alias
to save me with in case I get chased by space aliens
A brainiac, with a cranium packed, full of more uranium
than a maniac Saudi Arabian
A highly combustible head, spazmatic
strapped to a Kraftmatic adjustable bed
Laid up in the hospital in critical condition
I flatlined; jumped up and ran from the mortician
High speed, IV full of thai weed
Lookin Chinese, with my knees stuck together like siamese
twins, joined at the groin like lesbians
Uhh, pins and needles, hypodermic needles and pins
I hope God forgives me for my sins -- it probably all depends
on if I keep on killin my girlfriends

[Chorus: Eminem]

Cause any man who would jump in front of a minivan
for twenty grand and a bottle of pain pills and a minithin
is fuckin crazy -- you hear me? Ha?
Is fuckin crazy -- listen!!
Cause any man who would jump in front of a minivan
for twenty grand and a bottle of pain pills and a minithin
is fuckin crazy -- you hear me?
Is fuckin crazy

[Eminem]
Last night I O.D.'d on rush, mushrooms and dust
and got rushed to the hospital to get my system flushed
(Shucks!) I'm an alcoholic and that's all I can say
I call in to work, cause all I do is frolic and play
I swallow grenades, and take about a bottle a day
of Tylenol 3, and talk about how violent I'll be (RRARRRRH)
Give me eleven Excederin my head'll spin
Medicine'll get me revvin like a 747 jet engine
Scratched my balls til I shredded skin
"Doctor, check this rash, look how red it's been"
"It's probably AIDS!" Forget it then
I strike a still pose and hit you with some ill flows
that don't even make sense, like dykes usin dildos
So reach in your billfolds, for ten ducats
and pick up this Slim Shady shit that's on Rawkus
Somethin somethin somethin, somethin I get weeded
My daughter scribbled over that rhyme, I couldn't read it
Damn!

[Missy]
Slim Shady
Slim Shady
Slim Shady
Slim Shady

[Eminem]
Well I do pop pills, I keep my tube socks filled
Pop the same shit that got Tupac killed
Spit game to these hoes, like a soap opera episode
And punch a bitch in the nose, til her whole face explodes
There's three things I hate: girls, women and bitches
Smack bitches that walk up, and drop-kick midgets
Call me Boogie Night, the stalker that walks awkward
Stick figure, with a dick bigger than Mark Wahlberg
Comin through the airport, sluggish, walkin on crutches
Hit a fuckin [*pregnant chick*] in her [*stomach*] with luggage
It's like a dream I can't snap out, I black out, and back out
Lookin for some other thug, to beat the crap out
I'm bringin you rap singers two middle fingers
I flip you off in French, then translate in English
Then I'ma vanish off the face of the planet and come back
Speakin so much Spanish, Pun can't even understand it

[Missy] Won't you busa rhyme for me boy .. Slim Shady
[Shady] Yeah
[Missy] Won't you busa rhyme for me boy .. Slim motherfuckin Shady
[Shady] Yeah
[Missy] Won't you busa rhyme for me boy .. Slim Shady
[Shady] Yeah
[Missy] Won't you busa rhyme for me boy .. 

[Eminem]
I had a huge attitude, started off staticky
Mad at you, had you mad at me automatically (one more time)
I'm not a commodity, I'm an oddity
Who oddly enough developed himself a Halloween following
It's so big, if I counted up all the freaks who follow me
I'd probably owe Ozzy Osbourne an apology
College girls, live in an alcoholic's world
Full of earl, head twirls every time the toilet swirls *flush*
Covered in throw-up, and I refuse to grow up
I won't budge, I still tell a grown-up to shut up (SHUT UP!)
I made this rap game suspenseful, cause now I got a impulse
To give you insults wrote with a pencil (bitch)
And waste the paper on you, choppin down the oakwood
Cause everything that you wrote in your notebook was no good
And as long as I stay in the studio and keep cuttin
You motherfuckers are puttin your words together for nuttin

[Missy] Won't you busa rhyme for me boy .. Slim Shady
[Shady] What's the deal?
[Missy] Won't you busa rhyme for me boy .. Slim motherfuckin Shady
[Shady] Yeah.. who?
[Missy] Won't you busa rhyme for me boy .. Slim Shady
[Shady] What's the deal?
[Missy] Won't you busa rhyme for me boy .. 

[Missy]
Turn the music up, we gon' wake the neighbors
We gon' get high, we gon' roll to Vegas
Me and Slim Shady, on some shit daily
What you want what you got is it hot? (Is it hot?)

Turn the music up, we gon' wake the neighbors
We gon' get high, we gon' roll to Vegas
Me and Slim Shady, on some shit daily
What you want (yo) what you want (yo) ahh uhh yo

"A person from another planet might disagree with you"
"Well if you want my opinion, it comes from right here on Earth"

[Eminem]
Slim Shady.. Misdemeanor..
Timbaland.. Slim Shady..
Misdemeanor..

I'm homicidal, and suicidal with no friends
Holdin a gun with no handle, just a barrel at both ends
Sprayin tecs at you until you see your fuckin legs
With the bullet holes and the exit wounds layin next to you
(AHH!) Fuckin mad dog, foamin at the mouth
Fuck mouth, my whole house, is foamin at the couch
Jumped out of the 93rd floor of a building
And shot every window out on the way down to the ground (KEEP FILMING!)
Woke up to a hospital staff, got up and laughed, chopped em in half
Suffocated the oxygen mask
Shit if I get any higher, I'ma get the East and West beefin again
Slide back to Detroit and stand in the crossfire

[Missy]
Y'all better call the police 'fore I kill this track
Don't shoot Missy!!! Get back
Uhh, I'ma put you all in the line
Uhh, and I'ma watch you MC's die
Yo mommy, mommy, Missy done lost her mind!
I think somebody done pissed her off this time!
Yo, I'ma have to bust you through your chest and
Uhh, you will have to clean up the mess (uh-huh)
It's rainin rainin and it's pourin loud
Never fear, cause pissy Missy's through the crowd
Uhh, I hear the gats go cha-pow
Who shot me damnit? Bitch get down
Don't walk when I talk, I never talk when I smile (uh-huh)
Lay em on down, like they lived underground (uh)
For the sound, that me and, Timbaland, we found
Get your ass, kicked later, or get your ass, kicked now

Uhh.. one-two
Misdemeanor, Slim Shady
Timbaland, motherfucker
Uhh uhh uhh
Cool, cool, cool
Triple zero

Just the two of us.. (8X)

[Eminem]
Baby your da-da loves you (hey)
And I'ma always be here for you (hey) no matter what happens
You're all I got in this world
I would never give you up for nothin
Nobody in this world is ever gonna keep you from me
I love you

C'mon Hai-Hai, we goin to the beach
Grab a couple of toys and let da-da strap you in the car seat
Oh where's mama? She's takin a little nap in the trunk
Oh that smell (whew!) da-da musta runned over a skunk
Now I know what you're thinkin - it's kind of late to go swimmin
But you know your mama, she's one of those type of women
that do crazy things, and if she don't get her way, she'll throw a fit
Don't play with da-da's toy knife, honey, let go of it (no!)
And don't look so upset, why you actin bashful?
Don't you wanna help da-da build a sand castle? (yeah!)
And mama said she wants to show how far she can float
And don't worry about that little boo-boo on her throat
It's just a little scratch - it don't hurt, her was eatin
dinner while you were sweepin and spilled ketchup on her shirt
Mama's messy isn't she? We'll let her wash off in the water
and me and you can pway by ourselves, can't we?

Just the two of us.. (2X)
And when we ride!
Just the two of us.. (2X)
Just you and I!
Just the two of us.. (2X)
And when we ride!
Just the two of us.. (2X)
Just you and I!

See honey.. there's a place called heaven and a place called hell
A place called prison and a place called jail
And da-da's probably on his way to all of em except one
Cause mama's got a new husband and a stepson
And you don't want a brother do ya? (Nah)
Maybe when you're old enough to understand a little better
I'll explain it to ya
But for now we'll just say mama was real real bad
She was bein mean to dad and made him real real mad
But I still feel sad that I put her on time-out
Sit back in your chair honey, quit tryin to climb out (WAHH!)
I told you it's okay HaiHai, wanna ba-ba?
Take a night-night? Nan-a-boo, goo-goo ga-ga?
Her make goo-goo ca-ca? Da-da change your dia-dee
Clean the baby up so her can take a nighty-nighty
Your dad'll wake her up as soon as we get to the water
Ninety-seven Bonnie and Clyde, me and my daughter

Just the two of us.. (2X)
And when we ride!
Just the two of us.. (2X)
Just you and I!
Just the two of us.. (2X)
And when we ride!
Just the two of us.. (2X)
Just you and I!

Wake up sweepy head we're here, before we pway
we're gonna take mama for a wittle walk along the pier
Baby, don't cry honey, don't get the wrong idea
Mama's too sweepy to hear you screamin in her ear (ma-maa!)
That's why you can't get her to wake, but don't worry
Da-da made a nice bed for mommy at the bottom of the lake
Here, you wanna help da-da tie a rope around this rock? (yeah!)
We'll tie it to her footsie then we'll roll her off the dock
Ready now, here we go, on the count of free..
One.. two.. free.. WHEEEEEE! (whoooooshhhhh)
There goes mama, spwashin in the wa-ta
No more fightin wit dad, no more restraining order
No more step-da-da, no more new brother
Blow her kisses bye-bye, tell mama you love her (mommy!)
Now we'll go play in the sand, build a castle and junk
But first, just help dad with two more things out the trunk

Just the two of us.. (2X)
And when we ride!
Just the two of us.. (2X)
Just you and I!
Just the two of us.. (2X)
And when we ride!
Just the two of us.. (2X)
Just you and I!

Just the two of us.. (4X)

[Eminem]
Just me and you baby
is all we need in this world
Just me and you
Your da-da will always be there for you
Your da-da's always gonna love you
Remember that
If you ever need me I will always be here for you
If you ever need anything, just ASK
Da-da will be right there
Your da-da loves you
I love you baby

[Chorus One]
{Just pull the plug!}
People say that I'm a bad influence
I say the world's already fucked, I'm just addin to it
They say I'm suicidal, teenagers' newest idol {c'mon!}
C'mon do as I do, go ahead get mad and do it
{Just pull the plug!}
People say that I'm a bad influence
I say the world's already fucked, I'm just addin to it
They say I'm suicidal, teenagers' newest idol {c'mon!}
C'mon do as I do, go ahead get mad and do it
{Just let it gooo!}

[Eminem]
Hand me an .8, beam me up and land me in space
I'ma sit on top of the world {I'm here} and shit on Brandy and Mase
I'm more than ill
I'm scarier than a white journalist in a room with Lauryn Hill {Ahh!}
Human horror film
but with a lot funnier plot, and people that feel me
cause I'ma still be Madd Rapper, whether I got money or not {yup}
As long as I'm on pills, and I got plenty of pot
I'll be in a canoe paddlin, makin fun of your yacht
But I would like an award
for the best rapper to get one mic in The Source
and a wardrobe I can afford
Otherwise I might get sent up back-strike in a Ford
And you wonder what the fuck I need more Vicadin for
Everybody's pissin' me off; even the No Limit Tank
looks like a middle finger sideways flippin me off
No shit I'm a great danger to my health
Why else would I kill you then jump in the grave and bury myself?

[Chorus Two]
{Just pull the plug!}
People say that I'm a bad influence
I say the world's already fucked, I'm just addin to it
They say I'm suicidal, teenagers' newest idol {c'mon!}
C'mon do as I do, go ahead get mad and do it
{Just let it gooo!}
People say that I'm a bad influence
I say the world's already fucked, I'm just addin to it
They say I'm suicidal, teenagers' newest idol {c'mon!}
C'mon do as I do, go ahead get mad and do it
{Just do it!}

[Eminem]
I'm the illest rapper to hold the cordless, patrollin corners
Looking for hookers to punch in the mouth with a roll of quarters
I'm meaner in action than Roscoe beatin James Todd Sr.
across the back with vacuum cleaner attachments {Ow! Ow! Ow!}
I grew up in a wild hood, as a hazardous youth
with a fucked up childhood, that I used as an excuse
And ain't shit changed, I kept the same mindstate
since the third time that I failed 9th grade
You probably think that I'm a negative person, don't be so sure of it
I don't promote violence, I just encourage it {c'mon}
I laugh at the sight of death
as I fall down a cement flight of steps {ahhhhhhhh!}
and land inside a bed of spider webs
So throw caution to the wind; you and a friend
can jump off of a bridge and if you live, do it again
Shit, why not, blow your brain out, I'm blowin mine out
Fuck it, you only live once, you might as well die now!

[Chorus Three]
{Just let it gooo!}
People say that I'm a bad influence
I say the world's already fucked, I'm just addin to it
They say I'm suicidal, teenagers' newest idol {c'mon!}
C'mon do as I do, go ahead get mad and do it
{Just pull the plug!}
People say that I'm a bad influence
I say the world's already fucked, I'm just addin to it
They say I'm suicidal, teenagers' newest idol {c'mon!}
C'mon do as I do, go ahead get mad and do it
{Just do it!}

[Eminem]
My laser disc gon' make you take a razor to your wrist
Make you satanistic, make you take the pistol to your face
and place the clip and cock it back
and let it go until your brains are rippin out
your skull so bad to sew you back would be a waste of stitches
I'm not a "Role Model," I don't wanna babysit kids
I got one little girl, and Hailey Jade is Shady's business
And Shady's just an alias I made to make you pissed off
Where the fuck were you when Gil was paid to make me dishwash?
I make a couple statements and now look how crazy shit got
You made me get a bigger attitude than eighty Kim Scott's
And she almost got the same fate that Grady's bitch got
I knew that "Just the Two of Us" would make you hate me this much
And "Just the Two of Us," that ain't got shit to do with us
and our personal life, it's just words on a mic
So you can call me a punk, a pervert or a chauvinist pig
But the funny shit is that I still go with the bitch!

[Chorus Two]

OK, I'm going to attempt to drown myself
You can try this at home
You can be just like me!

Mic check one two.. we recordin?
I'm cancerous, so when I diss you wouldn't wanna answer this
If you responded back with a battle rap you wrote for Canibus
I strangled you to death then I choked you again
Then break your fuckin legs till your bones poke through your skin
You beef wit me, I'ma even the score equally
Take you on Jerry Springer, and beat yer ass legally
I get you blunted off of funny home grown
Cause when I smoke out I hit the trees harder than Sonny Bono
(Ohh no!!) So if I said I never did drugs
That would mean I lie AND get fucked more than the President does
Hillary Clinton tried to slap me and call me a pervert
I ripped her fuckin tonsils out and fed her sherbet (Bitch!)
My nerves hurt, and lately I'm on edge
Grabbed Vanilla Ice and ripped out his blonde dreads (Fuck you!)
Every girl I ever went out wit is goin lez
Follow me and do exactly what the song says:
smoke weed, take pills, drop outta school, kill people and drink
And jump behind the wheel like it was still legal
I'm dumb enough to walk in a store and steal
So I'm dumb enough to ask for a date with Lauryn Hill
Some people only see that I'm white, ignorin skill
Cause I stand out like a green hat with a orange bill
But I don't get pissed, y'all don't even see through the mist
How the fuck can I be white, I don't even exist
I get a clean shave, bathe, go to a rave
Die from an overdose and dig myself up out of my grave
My middle finger won't go down, how do I wave?
And this is how I'm supposed to teach kids how to behave?

Now follow me and do exactly what you see
Don't you wanna grow up to be just like me!
I slap women and eat shrooms then O.D.
Now don't you wanna grow up to be just like me!

Me and Marcus Allen went over to see Nicole
When we heard a knock at the door, must have been Ron Gold'
Jumped behind the door, put the orgy on hold
Killed em both and smeared blood in a white Bronco (we did it!)
My mind won't work if my spine don't jerk
I slapped Garth Brooks out of his Rhinestone shirt
I'm not a player just a ill rhyme sayer
That'll spray an Aerosol can up at the ozone layer (psssssssh)
My rap style's warped, I'm runnin out the morgue
witcha dead grandmother's corpse to throw it on your porch
Jumped in a Chickenhawk cartoon wit a cape on
And beat up Foghorn Leghorn with an acorn
I'm bout as normal as Norman Bates, with deformative traits
A premature birth that was four minutes late
Mother.. are you there? I love you
I never meant to hit you over the head with that shovel
Will someone explain to my brain that I just severed
a main vein with a chainsaw and I'm in pain?
I take a breather and sighed; either I'm high, or I'm nuts
Cause if you ain't tiltin this room, neither am I
So when you see your mom with a thermometer shoved in her ass
Then it probably is obvious I got it on with her
Cause when I drop this solo shit it's over with
I bought Cage's tape, opened it, and dubbed over it

I came to the club drunk with a fake ID
Don't you wanna grow up to be just like me!
I've been with 10 women who got HIV
Now don't you wanna grow up to be just like me!
I got genital warts and it burns when I pee
Don't you wanna grow up to be just like me!
I tie a rope around my penis and jump from a tree
You probably wanna grow up to be just like me!!!

[Eminem]
You know I just don't get it
Last year I was nobody
This year I'm sellin records
Now everybody wants to come around like I owe em somethin
Heh, the fuck you want from me, ten million dollars?
Get the fuck out of here

[Chorus One: Eminem]

You see I'm, just Marshall Mathers (Marshall Mathers)
I'm just a regular guy,
I don't know why all the fuss about me (fuss about me)
Nobody ever gave a fuck before,
all they did was doubt me (did was doubt me)
Now everybody wanna run they mouth
and try to take shots at me (take shots at me)

[Eminem]
Yo, you might see me joggin, you might see me walkin
You might see me walkin a dead rottweiler dog
with it's head chopped off in the park with a spiked collar
hollerin at him cause the son of a bitch won't quit barkin
(grrrr, ARF ARF) Or leanin out a window, with a cocked shotgun
Drivin up the block in the car that they shot 'Pac in
Lookin for Big's killers, dressed in ridiculous
blue and red like I don't see what the big deal is
Double barrel twelve gauge bigger than Chris Wallace
Pissed off, cause Biggie and 'Pac just missed all this
Watchin all these cheap imitations get rich off 'em
and get dollars that shoulda been there's like they switched wallets
And amidst all this Crist' poppin and wristwatches
I had to sit back and just watch and just get nauseous
and walk around with an empty bottle of Remi Martin
startin shit like some 26-year-old skinny Cartman ("God damnit!")
I'm anti-Backstreet and Ricky Martin
with instincts to kill N'Sync, don't get me started
These fuckin brats can't sing and Britney's garbage
What's this bitch retarded? Gimme back my sixteen dollars
All I see is sissies in magazines smiling
Whatever happened to whylin out and bein violent?
Whatever happened to catchin a good-ol' fashioned
passionate ass-whoopin and gettin your shoes coat and your hat tooken?
New Kids on the Block, sucked a lot of dick
Boy/girl groups make me sick
And I can't wait 'til I catch all you faggots in public
I'ma love it.. (hahaha)
Vanilla Ice don't like me (uh-uh)
Said some shit in Vibe to spite me (yup)
Then went and dyed his hair just like me (hehe)
A bunch of little kids wanna swear just like me
and run around screamin, "I don't care, just bite me" (nah nah)
I think I was put here to annoy the world
and destroy your little 4-year-old boy or girl
Plus I was put here to put fear in faggots who spray Faygo Root Beer
and call themselves "Clowns" cause they look queer
Faggot2Dope and Silent Gay
Claimin Detroit, when y'all live twenty miles away (fuckin punks)
And I don't wrestle, I'll knock you fuckin faggots the fuck out
Ask 'em about the club they was at when they snuck out
after they ducked out the back when they saw us and bugged out
(AHHH!) Ducked down and got paintballs shot at they truck, blaow!
Look at y'all runnin your mouth again
when you ain't seen a fuckin Mile Road, South of 10
And I don't need help, from D-12, to beat up two females
in make-up, who may try to scratch me with Lee Nails
"Slim Anus," you damn right, Slim Anus
I don't get fucked in mine like you two little flaming faggots!

[Chorus Two: Eminem]

Cause I'm, just Marshall Mathers (Marshall Mathers)
I'm not a wrestler guy,
I'll knock you out if you talk about me (you talk about me)
Come and see me on the streets alone
if you assholes doubt me (assholes doubt me)
And if you wanna run your mouth
then come take your best shot at me (your best shot at me)

[Eminem]
Is it because you love me that y'all expect so much of me?
You little groupie bitch, get off me, go fuck Puffy
Now because of this blonde mop that's on top
and this fucked up head that I've got, I've gone pop?
The underground just spunned around and did a 360
Now these kids diss me and act like some big sissies
"Oh, he just did some shit with Missy,
so now he thinks he's too big to do some shit with MC Get-Bizzy"
My fuckin bitch mom's suin for ten million
She must want a dollar for every pill I've been stealin
Shit, where the fuck you think I picked up the habit?
All I had to do was go in her room and lift up her mattress
Which is it bitch, Mrs. Briggs or Ms. Mathers?
It doesn't matter your [attorney Fred Gibson's a] faggot!
Talkin about I fabricated my past
He's just aggravated I won't ejaculate in his ass (Uhh!)
So tell me, what the hell is a fella to do?
For every million I make, another relative sues
Family fightin and fussin over who wants to invite me to supper
All the sudden, I got 90 some cousins (Hey it's me!)
A half-brother and sister who never seen me
or even bothered to call me until they saw me on TV
Now everybody's so happy and proud
I'm finally allowed to step foot in my girlfriend's house
Hey-hey! And then to top it off, I walked to the newsstand
to buy this cheap-ass little magazine with a food stamp
Skipped to the last page, flipped right fast
and what do I see? A picture of my big white ass
Okay, let me give you motherfuckers some help:
uhh, here - DOUBLE XL, DOUBLE XL
Now your magazine shouldn't have so much trouble to sell
Ahh fuck it, I'll even buy a couple myself

[Chorus One (2X)]

[Intro: Frogg]

Whoah!
A get your hands in the air, and get to clappin 'em
and like, back and forth because ah
this is.. what you thought it wasn't
It beez.. the brothers representin' the Dirty Dozen
I be the F-R-O the double G *coughing in background*
And check out the man he goes by the name of er...

[Verse One: Eminem]

Slim Shady, brain dead like Jim Brady
I'm a M80, you Lil' like that Kim lady
I'm buzzin, Dirty Dozen, naughty rotten rhymer
Cursin at you players worse than Marty Schottenheimer
You wacker than the motherfucker you bit your style from
You ain't gonna sell two copies if you press a double album
Admit it, fuck it, while we comin out in the open
I'm doin acid, crack, smack, coke and smokin dope then
My name is Marshall Mathers, I'm an alcoholic (Hi Marshall)
I have a disease and they don't know what to call it
Better hide your wallet cause I'm comin up quick to strip your cash
Bought a ticket to your concert just to come and whip your ass
Bitch, I'm comin out swingin, so fast it'll make your eyes spin
You gettin knocked the fuck out like Mike Tyson
The +Proof+ is in the puddin, just ask the Deshaun Holton
I'll slit your motherfuckin throat worse than Ron Goldman

[Chorus:]

So when you see me on your block with two glocks
Screamin _Fuck the World_ like Tupac
I just don't give a fuuuuuck!!
Talkin that shit behind my back, dirty mackin
tellin your boys that I'm on crack
I just don't give a fuuuuuck!!
So put my tape back on the rack
Go run and tell your friends my shit is wack
I just don't give a fuuuuuck!!
But see me on the street and duck
Cause you gon' get stuck, stoned, and snuffed
Cause I just don't give a fuuuuuck!!

[Verse Two: Eminem]

I'm Nicer than Pete, but I'm on a Serch to crush a Miilkbone
I'm Everlast-ing, I melt Vanilla Ice like silicone
I'm ill enough to just straight up diss you for no reason
I'm colder than snow season when it's twenty below freezin
Flavor with no seasonin, this is the sneak preview
I'll diss your magazine and still won't get a weak review
I'll make your freak leave you, smell the Folgers crystals
This is a lyrical combat, gentlemen hold your pistols
But I form like Voltron and blast you with my shoulder missiles
Slim Shady, Eminem was the old initials (Bye-bye!)
Extortion, snortin, supportin abortion
Pathological liar, blowin shit out of proportion
The looniest, zaniest, spontaneous, sporadic
Impulsive thinker, compulsive drinker, addict
Half animal, half man
Dumpin your dead body inside of a fuckin trash can
With more holes than an Afghan

[Chorus]

[Verse Three: Eminem]

Somebody let me out this limousine (hey, let me out!)
I'm a caged demon, on stage screamin like Rage Against the Machine
I'm convinced I'm a fiend, shootin up while this record is spinnin
Clinically brain dead, I don't need a second opinion
Fuck droppin the jewel, I'm flippin the sacred treasure
I'll bite your motherfuckin style, just to make it fresher
I can't take the pressure, I'm sick of bitches
Sick of naggin bosses bitchin while I'm washin dishes
In school I never said much, too busy havin a headrush
Doin too much rush had my face flushed like red blush
Then I went to Jim Beam, that's when my face grayed
Went to gym in eighth grade, raped the women's swim team
Don't take me for a joke I'm no comedian
Too many mental problems got me snortin coke and smokin weed again
I'm goin up over the curb, drivin on the median
Finally made it home, but I don't got the key to get in

[Chorus]

[Outro: Eminem]

Hey, fuck that!
Outsidaz..
Pace One..
Young Zee..

[Dr. Dre]
Y'all know me, still the same O.G., but I been low key
Hated on by most these niggaz wit no cheese, no deals and no G's
No wheels and no keys, no boats no snowmobiles, and no ski's
Mad at me cause I can finally afford to provide my family wit groceries
Got a crib wit a studio and it's all full of tracks to add to the wall full of plaques
Hangin up in the office in back of my house like trophies
Did y'all think I'ma let my dough freeze?Hoe please
You better bow down on both knees
Who you think taught you to smoke trees?
Who you think brought you the oldies?
Eazy-E's, Ice Cube's, and D.O.C's
The Snoop D-O-double-G's and the group that said mother-"Fuck Tha Police"
Gave you a tape full of dope beats to bump when you stroll through in your hood
And when your album sales wasn't doin too good who's the Doctor they told you to go see?
Y'all better listen up closely
All you niggaz that said that I turned pop, or The Firm flopped 
Y'all are the reason that Dre ain't been gettin no sleep
So FUCK Y'ALL, all of y'all; if y'all don't like me, BLOW ME!
Y'all are gonna keep fuckin around wit me and turn me back to the old me

[Eminem]
Nowadays everybody wanna talk like they got somethin to say
But nothin comes out when they move their lips; just a bunch of gibberish
And motherfuckers act like they forgot about Dre
Nowadays everybody wanna talk like they got somethin to say
But nothin comes out when they move their lips; just a bunch of gibberish
And motherfuckers act like they forgot about Dre

[Eminem]
So what do you say to somebody you hate (What?)
Or anyone tryin to bring trouble your way?
Wanna resolve things in a bloodier way? (YUP)
Then just study a tape of N.W.A.!
One day I was walkin by, wit a Walkman on, when I caught a guy give me an awkward eye (What you lookin at?)
And strangled him off in the parkin lot, wit his Karl Kani

I don't give a fuck if it's dark or not
I'm harder than me tryin to park a Dodge when I'm drunk as fuck
Right next to a humungous truck in a two-car garage {*CRUNCH*}
Hoppin out wit two broken legs, tryin to walk it off
"Fuck you too bitch, call the cops!"
I'ma kill you and them loud ass motherfuckin barkin dogs
And when the cops came through me and Dre stood next to a burnt down house
Wit a can full of gas and a hand full of matches
And still weren't found out (RIGHT HERE)
From here on out it's the Chronic 2
Startin today and tomorrow's the new
And I'm still loco enough
To choke you to death wit a Charleston Chew
Slim shady - hotter then a set of twin babiesin a Mercedes Benz wit the windows up when the temp goes up to the mid 80's
Callin men ladies; sorry Doc but I been crazy
There's no way that you can save me
It's okay, go with him Hailey (Da-da?)

[Eminem]
Nowadays everybody wanna talk like they got somethin to say
But nothin comes out when they move their lips; just a bunch of gibberish
And motherfuckers act like they forgot about Dre
Nowadays everybody wanna talk like they got somethin to say
But nothin comes out when they move their lips; just a bunch of gibberish
And motherfuckers act like they forgot about Dre

[Dr. Dre]
If it was up to me, you muh'fuckers would stop comin up to mewit your hands out lookin up to me
Like you want somethin free
When my last CD was out, you wasn't bumpin me
But now that I got this little company
Everybody wanna come to me like it was some disease
But you won't get a crumb from me
Cause I'm from the streets of (Compton, Compton)
I told em all - all them little gangstas 
Who you think helped mold 'em all?
Now you wanna run around talkin bout guns like I ain't got none
What you think I sold 'em all?
Cause I stay well off
Now all I get is hate mail all day sayin Dre fell off
What cause I been in the lab wit a pen and a pad tryin to get this damn label off?


I ain't havin that; this is the millenium of Aftermath
It ain't gon' be nothin after that
So give me one more platinum plaqueand fuck rap!You can have it back
So where's all the Madd Rappers at?
It's like a jungle in this habitat
But all you savage cats, know that I was strapped wit gats when you were cuddlin a Cabbage Patch

[Eminem]
Nowadays everybody wanna talk like they got somethin to say
But nothin comes out when they move their lips; just a bunch of gibberish
And motherfuckers act like they forgot about Dre
Nowadays everybody wanna talk like they got somethin to say
But nothin comes out when they move their lips; just a bunch of gibberish
And motherfuckers act like they forgot about Dre

[Eminem]
Nowadays everybody wanna talk like they got somethin to say
But nothin comes out when they move their lips; just a bunch of gibberish
And motherfuckers act like they forgot about Dre

[Girl] Yeaaah, hahahaha...whooooo, shit!
[Em] (aight)
[Eminem] Guess what? I ain't coming in yet...
I'll come in a minute
[Eminem] Ayo...This is my love song...it goes like this

[Eminem]
Back when Mark Walhberg was Marky Mark
This is how we used to make the party start
We used to mix Hen' with Bacardi Dark
And when it, kicks in you can hardly talk
And by the, sixth gin you're gonna probably crawl
And you'll be, sick then and you'll probably barf
And my pre-diction is you're gonna probably fall
Either somewhere in the lobby or the hallway wall
And everything's spinning
You're beginin' to think women
are swimming in pink linen again in the sink
Then in a couple of minutes that bottle of Guiness is finished
You are now allowed to officially slap bitches
You have the right to remain violent and start wilin'
Start a fight with the same guy that was smart eyin' you
Get in your car, start it, and start drivin'
Over the island and cause a 42 car pile-up
[Em's spaceman voice]Earth calling, pilot to co-pilot
Look at the life on this planet, sir, no sign of it
All I can see is a bunch of smoke flyin'
And I'm so high that I might die if I go by it
Let me out of this place
I'm outta place
I'm in outer space
I've just vanished without a trace
I'm going to a pretty place now where the flowers grow
I'll be back in an hour or so

[Chorus]

[Eminem]
'Cause every time I go to try to leave
Something keeps pullin' on my sleeve
I don't wanna, but I gotta stay
These drugs really got ahold of me

'Cause every time I try to tell them "no"
They won't let me ever let them go
I'm a sucka all I gotta say
These drugs really got ahold of me

[Eminem]
In third grade, all I used to do
Was sniff glue through a tube and play rubix cube
17 years later I'm as Rude as Jude
Scheming on the first chick with the hugest boobs
I've got no game
And every face looks the same
They've got no name
So I don't need game to play
I just say whatever I want to whoever I want
Whenever I want, wherever I want, however I want
However, I do show some respect to few
As ecstacy got me standing next to you
Getting sentimental as fuck spillin' guts to you
We just met
But I think I'm in love with you
But you're on it too
So you tell me you love me too
Wake up in the morning like "yo, what the fuck we do?"
I gotta go bitch
You know I have stuff to do
'Cause if I get caught cheatin' then I'm stuck with you
But in the long run
These drugs are probably going to catch up sooner or later
But fuck it, I'm on one
So let's enjoy
Let the X destroy your spinal cord
So it's not a straight line no more
'Til we walk around looking like some wind-up dolls
Shit's sticking out of our backs like a dinosaur
Shit, six hits won't even get me high no more
So bye for now
I'm going to try to find some more

[Chorus]

[Eminem]
That's the sound of a bottle when it's hollow
When you swallow it all wollow and drown in your sorrow
And tomorrow you're probably going to want to do it again
What's a little spinal fluid between you and a friend? Screw it
And what's a little bit of alcohol poisoning?
And what's a little fight?
Tomorrow you'll be boys again
It's your life
Live it however you wanna
Marijuana is everywhere
Where was you brought up?
It don't matter as long as you get where you're going
'Cause none of the shit is going to mean shit where we're going
They tell you to stop, but you just sit there ignoring
Even though you wake up feeling like shit every morning
But you're young
You've got a lot of drugs to do
Girls to screw
Parties to crash
Sucks to be you
If I could take it all back now, I wouldn't
I would have did more shit that people said that I shouldn't
But I'm all grown up now and upgraded and graduated
Did better drugs and updated
But I've still got a lot of growing up to do
I've still got a whole lot of throwing up to spew
But when it's all said and done I'll be 40
Before I know it with a 40 on the porch telling stories
With a bottle of Jack
Two grandkids in my lap
Babysiting for Haley while Haley's out getting smashed

[Chorus 2x]
[Same as previous, but 2nd time the last line is repeated like this]

Drugs really got ahold of me
They really got ahold of me
'Cause drugs really got ahold of me
They really got ahold of me

[Puff] Bad Boy baby
[Big] Yeah.. yeah..
Junior M.A.F.I.A., yeah..
[Puff] Yeah.. B.I.G. 2000
B.I.G. 2000 Born Again.. c'mon..

[Notorious B.I.G.]
The weak or the strong, who got it goin on
You're dead wrong
The weak or the strong, who got it goin on
You're dead wrong

[Notorious B.I.G.]
Relax and take notes, while I take tokes of the marijuana smoke
Throw you in a choke - gun smoke, gun smoke
Biggie Smalls for mayor, the rap slayer
The hooker layer - motherfucker say your prayers
Hail Mary full of grace.. smack the bitch in the face;
Take her Gucci bag and the North Face 
Off her back, jab her if she act
Funny with the money oh you got me mistaken honey
I don't wanna rape ya, I just want the paper
The Visa, kapeesha? I'm out like, "The Vapors"
Who's the one you call Mr. Macho, the head honcho
Swift fist like Camacho, I got so
Much style I should be down wit the Stylistics
Make up to break up {*singing in background*} niggaz need to wake up
Smell the indonesia; beat you to a seizure
Then fuck your moms, hit the skins til amnesia
She don't remember shit! Just the two hits!
Her hittin the floor, and me hittin the clits!
Suckin on the tits! Had the hooker beggin for the dick
And your moms ain't ugly love; my dick got rock quick
I guess I was a combination of House of Pain and Bobby Brown
I was "Humpin Around" and "Jump-in Around"
Jacked her then I asked her who's the man; she said, "B-I-G"
Then I bust in her E-Y-E (Yo Big, you're dead wrong)

[Notorious B.I.G.]
The weak or the strong, who got it goin on
You're dead wrong
The weak or the strong, who got it goin on
You're dead wrong
The weak or the strong, who got it goin on
You're dead wrong
The weak or the strong, who got it goin on
You're dead wrong
"I don't care what nobody say"
"I don't care what nobody say"
"I don't care what nobody say"
"I don't care what nobody say"

[Notorious B.I.G.]
When I get dusted, I like to spread the blood like mustard
Trust it, my hardcore rain leaves you rusted
Move over Lucifer, I'm more ruthless, huh
Leave your toothless, you'll kibbitz, I'll flip it
Tears don't affect me, I hit 'em with the tech G
Disrespect me - my potency is deadly
I'm shootin babies, no ifs ands or maybes
Hit mummy in the tummy if the hooker plays a dummy
Slit the wrist of little sis
After she sucked the dick, I stabbed her brother with the icepick
Because he wanted me to fuck him from the back
But Smalls don't get down like that
Got your father hidin in a room; fucked him with the broom
Slit him down the back and threw salt in the wound
Who you think you're dealin with?
Anybody step into my path is fuckin feelin it!
Hardcore, I got it sucked like a pussy
Stab ya til you're gushy, so please don't push.. me
I'm using rubbers so they won't trace the semen
The black demon, got the little hookers screamin
Because you know I love it young, fresh and green
With no hair in between, know what I mean?

[Notorious B.I.G.]
The weak or the strong, who got it goin on
You're dead wrong
The weak or the strong, who got it goin on
You're dead wrong
The weak or the strong, who got it goin on
You're dead wrong
The weak or the strong, who got it goin on
You're dead wrong
"I don't care what nobody say"
"I don't care what nobody say"
"I don't care what nobody say"
"I don't care what nobody say"

[Puff] Ladies and gentlemen..

[Eminem]
There's several different levels to Devil worshippin: horse's heads,
Human sacrifices, canibalism; candles and exorcism
Animals havin sex with 'em; camels mammals and rabbits
But I don't get into that, I kick the habit - I just,
Beat you to death with weapons that eat through the flesh
And I never eat you unless the fuckin, meat looks fresh
I got a lion in my pocket, I'm lyin, I got a nine in my pocket
And baby I'm just, dyin to cock him
He's ready for war, I'm ready for war
I got machetes and swords for any faggot that said he was raw
My uz' as, heavy as yours, yeah you met me before
I just didn't have as large an arsenal of weapons before
Marshall will step in the door, I lay your head on the floor
With your body spread on the bedspread, red on the wall
Red on the ceilin, red on the floor, get a new whore
Met on the second, wet on the third;
Then she's dead on the fourth - I'm dead wrong

[Notorious B.I.G.]
The weak or the strong, who got it goin on
You're dead wrong
The weak or the strong, who got it goin on
You're dead wrong
The weak or the strong, who got it goin on
You're dead wrong
The weak or the strong, who got it goin on
You're dead wrong
"I don't care what nobody say"
"I don't care what nobody say"
"I don't care what nobody say"
"I don't care what nobody say"

[Notorious B.I.G.]
The weak or the strong, who got it goin on
You're dead wrong
The weak or the strong, who got it goin on
You're dead wrong
The weak or the strong, who got it goin on
You're dead wrong
The weak or the strong, who got it goin on
You're dead wrong

[Puff Daddy]
Uh-huh, and we won't stop, because we can't stop

[Dre]
Yeah whattup Detroit?
[Snoop]
Nu-uh, nu-uh nuh-no he didn't!
Ahhh! They didn't do it again,
what-what, what-what?
Did you shit on these niggaz two times Dr. Dre?
[Dre]
Oh fo' sho'!
[Snoop]
Uh-uh, naw, ya smell that?
This is special right here
What-what, what-what-what?
Yeah, it's a toast to the boogie baby
Uhh, to the boogie-oogie-oogie
Yeah, y'know! What's crackin Dre?

[Dr. Dre]
Just let me lay back and kick some mo' simplistic pimp shit
on Slim's shit and start riots like Limp Bizkit (Limp Bizkit)
Throw on 'Guilty Conscience' at concerts
and watch mosh pits til motherfuckers knock each other unconcious
(Watch out now!) Some of these crowds that Slim draws
is rowdy as Crenshaw Boulevard when it's packed and fulla cars
Some of these crowds me and Snoop draw +IS+ niggaz from Crenshaw
from Long Beach to South Central
[*LOUD SCREAM*] Whoa, not these niggaz again
These grown-ass ignorant men with hair-triggers again
(Hehe) You and what army could harm me?
D-R-E and Shady, with Doggy from Long Beach
(East-syde!) Came a long way, to makin these songs play
It'll be a wrong move, to stare at me the wrong way
I got a long uz', and I carry it all day
(Blaow!) Sometimes it's like a nightmare, just bein Andre,
but I..

[Snoop Dogg]
somehow, someway - tell 'em, nigga
You know about Dogg-ay (Snoop Dogg)
Now let me cut these niggaz up and show em where da fuck I'm comin from
I get the party crackin from the shit that I be spittin son
Hit-and-run, get it done, get the funds, split and run
Got about fifty gungs, and I love all of 'em the same - bang bang!
Damn baby girl what's your name?
I forgot - what'd you say it was? Damn a nigga buzzed
Hangin in the club, with my nephew Eminem
(Whassup Slim?) Whattup cuz? (Whattup Snoop?)
The Great White American Hope, done hooked up
with the King of the motherfuckin West coast, bay-bayy!

[Chorus: Nate Dogg (+Snoop)]

And you don't really wanna fuck, with me
Only nigga that I trust, is me
Fuck around and make me bust, this heat
[Snoop] That's, the devil, they always wanna dance

[Xzibit]
I'm the Head Nigga In Charge, I'm watchin you move
You're found dead in your garage, with ten o'clock news coverage
Gotta love it, cause I expose the facade
Your little lungs is too small to hotbox with God
All jokes aside, come bounce with us
Standin over you with a twelve gauge, about to bust
It's like ashes to ashes and dust to dust
I might leave in the bodybag, but never in cuffs
So who do you trust? They just not rugged enough
When things get rough I'm in the club shootin with Puff
Bitch, please - you must have a mental disease
Assume the position and get back down on your knees - c'mon

[Chorus 2X]

[Eminem - impersonating Snoop]
Awww naww, big Slim Dogg
Eighty pound balls, dick six inch long
Back up, in the, heezy BAY-BAY
He's Sha-day!

[Snoop]
He's so cra-zay!

[Eminem]
Hahaha! Gimme the mic, let me recite, 'til Timothy White
pickets outside the Interscope offices every night
What if he's right? I'm just a criminal, makin a living
off of the world's misery - what in the world gives me the right
to say what I like, and walk around flippin the bird
Livin the urban life, like a white kid from the 'burbs
Dreamin at night of screamin at mom, schemin to leave
Run away from home and grow to be as evil as me
I just want you all to notice me and people to see
that somewhere deep down, there's a decent human being in me
It just can't be found, so the reason you've been seeing this me
is cause this is me now, the recent dude who's being this mean
So when you see me, dressin up like a nerd on TV
or heard the CD usin the fag word so freely
it's just me being me, here want me to tone it down?
[*LOWER pitch*] Suck my fuckin dick, you faggot
You happy now? Look here

[Eminem - impersonating Snoop]
I start some trouble everywhere that I go (that I go)
Ask the bouncers in the club cause they know (cause they know)
I start some shit they throw me out the back do' (the back do')
Come back and shoot the club up with a fo'-fo' (a fo'-fo')

[Chorus 2X]

[Xzibit]
2001 and forever
Slim Shady, Dr. Dre, Snoop Dogg, X to the Z, Nate Dogg
C'mon, yeah!!

Ah yeah, yo!
This song is dedicated to all the happy people
All the happy people who have real nice lives
And who have no idea whats it like to be broke as fuck

[Verse One:]

I feel like I'm walking a tight rope, without a circus net
I'm popping perkasets, I'm a nervous wreck
I deserve respect; but I work a sweat for this worthless check
Bout to burst this tech, at somebody to reverse this debt
Minimum wage got my adrenaline caged
Full of venom and rage
Especially when I'm engaged
And my daughter's down to her last diaper
That's got my ass hyper
I pray that god answers, maybe I'll ask nicer
Watching ballers while they flossing in their pathfinders
These overnight stars becoming autograph signers
We'll all gone blow up and leave the past behind us
Along with the small fry's and average half pinters
While playa haters turn bitch like they have vaginas
Cause we see them dollar signs and let the cash blind us
Money will brainwash you and leave your ass mindless
Snakes slither in the grass spineless

[Chorus: repeat 2X]

That's Rock Bottom
When this life makes you mad enough to kill
That's Rock Bottom
When you want something bad enough you'll steal
That's Rock Bottom
When you feel you have had it up to here
Cause you mad enough to scream but you sad enough to tear

[Verse Two:]

My life is full of empty promises
And broken dreams
I'm hoping things will look up
But there ain't no job openings
I feel discouraged hungry and malnourished
Living in this house with no furnace, unfurnished
And I'm sick of working dead end jobs with lame pay
And I'm tired of being hired and fired the same day
But fuck it, if you know the rules to the game play
Cause when we die we know were all going the same way
It's cool to be player, but it sucks to be the fan
When all you need is bucks to be the man
Plus a luxury sedan
Too comfortable and roomy in a six
They threw me in the mix
With all these gloomy lunatics
Walk around depressed
And smoke a pound of ses a day
And yesterday went by so quick it seems like it was just today
My daughter wants to throw the ball but I'm too stressed to play
Live half my life and throw the rest away

[Chorus]

There's people that love me and people that hate me
But it's the evil that made me this backstabbing, deceitful, and shady
I want the money, the women, the fortune, and the fame
That Means I'll end up burning in hell scorching in flames
That means I'm stealing your checkbook and forging your name
Lifetime bliss for eternal torture and pain
Right now I feel like just hit the rock bottom
I got problems now everybody on my blocks got 'em
I'm screaming like those two cops when 2pac shot 'em
Holding two glocks, I hope your doors got new locks on 'em
My daughter's feet ain't got no shoes or sock's on 'em
And them rings you wearing look like they got a few rocks on 'em
And while you flaunting them I could be taking them to shops to pawn them
I got a couple of rings and a brand new watch you want 'em?
Cause I never went gold of one song
I'm running up on someone's lawns with guns drawn

[Chorus]

[Eminem]
When I just a little baby boy,
my momma used to tell me these crazy things
She used to tell me my daddy was an evil man,
she used to tell me he hated me
But then I got a little bit older
and I realized, she was the crazy one
But there was nothin I could do or say to try to change it
cause that's just the way she was

They said I can't rap about bein broke no more
They ain't say I can't rap about coke no more
(AHHH!) Slut, you think I won't choke no whore
til the vocal cords don't work in her throat no more?!
(AHHH!) These motherfuckers are thinkin I'm playin
Thinkin I'm sayin the shit cause I'm thinkin it just to be sayin it
(AHHH!) Put your hands down bitch, I ain't gon' shoot you
I'ma pull +YOU+ to this bullet, and put it through you
(AHHH!) Shut up slut, you're causin too much chaos
Just bend over and take it like a slut, okay Ma?
"Oh, now he's raping his own mother, abusing a whore,
snorting coke, and we gave him the Rolling Stone cover?"
You god damn right BITCH, and now it's too late
I'm triple platinum and tragedies happen in two states
I invented violence, you vile venomous volatile bitches
vain Vicadin, vrinnn Vrinnn, VRINNN! [*chainsaw revs up*]
Texas Chainsaw, left his brains all
danglin from his neck, while his head barely hangs on
Blood, guts, guns, cuts
Knives, lives, wives, nuns, sluts

[Chorus: Eminem]

Bitch I'ma kill you! You don't wanna fuck with me
Girls neither - you ain't nuttin but a slut to me
Bitch I'ma kill you! You ain't got the balls to beef
We ain't gon' never stop beefin I don't squash the beef
You better kill me! I'ma be another rapper dead
for poppin off at the mouth with shit I shouldn'ta said
But when they kill me - I'm bringin the world with me
Bitches too! You ain't nuttin but a girl to me
.. I said you don't, wanna fuck with Shady (cause why?)
Cause Shady, will fuckin kill you (ah-haha)
I said you don't, wanna fuck with Shady (why?)
Cause Shady, will fuckin kill you..

[Eminem]
Bitch I'ma kill you! Like a murder weapon, I'ma conceal you
in a closet with mildew, sheets, pillows and film you
Buck with me, I been through hell, shut the hell up!
I'm tryin to develop these pictures of the Devil to sell 'em
I ain't "acid rap," but I rap on acid
Got a new blow-up doll and just had a strap-on added
WHOOPS! Is that a subliminal hint? NO!
Just criminal intent to sodomize women again
Eminem offend? NO! Eminem insult
And if you ever give in to him, you give him an impulse
to do it again, THEN, if he does it again
you'll probably end up jumpin out of somethin up on the 10th
(Ahhhhhhhh!) Bitch I'ma kill you, I ain't done this ain't the chorus
I ain't even drug you in the woods yet to paint the forest
A bloodstain is orange after you wash it three or four times
in a tub but that's normal ain't it Norman?
Serial killer hidin murder material
in a cereal box on top of your stereo
Here we go again, we're out of our medicine
out of our minds, and we want in yours, let us in

[Chorus (first line starts "Or I'ma kill you!")]

[Eminem]
Eh-heh, know why I say these things?
Cause lady's screams keep creepin in Shady's dreams
And the way things seem, I shouldn't have to pay these shrinks
this eighty G's a week to say the same things TWEECE!
TWICE? Whatever, I hate these things
Fuck shots! I hope the weed'll outweigh these drinks
Motherfuckers want me to come on their radio shows
just to argue with 'em cause their ratings stink?
FUCK THAT! I'll choke radio announcer to bouncer
from fat bitch to off seventy-thousand pounds of her
from principal to the student body and counselor
from in-school to before school to out of school
I don't even believe in breathin I'm leavin air in your lungs
just to hear you keep screamin for me to seep it
OKAY, I'M READY TO GO PLAY
I GOT THE MACHETE FROM O.J.
I'M READY TO MAKE EVERYONE'S THROATS ACHE
You faggots keep eggin me on
til I have you at knifepoint, then you beg me to stop?
SHUT UP! Give me your hands and feet
I said SHUT UP when I'm talkin to you
YOU HEAR ME? ANSWER ME!

[Chorus]
[first line starts "Or I'ma kill you!", ninth line starts "Bitch I'ma kill you!"]

[Eminem]
Hahaha, I'm just playin ladies
You know I love you

Eminem: Aite
Fred Durst: Check! Slim Shady, do the mic. kid

(Eminem)
I don't do black music
I don't do Withe music
I make fight music
For High School kids
I pull side full grips 
When I drive like this {screech}
With a slipped disk

From a Limp Bizkit diss
I just missed the gift list for Christmas gifts
So I get pissed and can't pick which wrist to slit
Little rich kids in cribs
Don't attempt this shit 
Just step back
While I prep up to pimp this bitch
So I said to the girl, I'm like
"What up girl?"
"Shut up girl!"
And showed her a cut-up squirrel
She screamed bloody murder so loud everybody heard her
Slapped me in the mouth and called me a nutty murderer
I moved on to two blondes 
And kissed 'em on a futon
{Ay yo baby!}
{What do you want?!}
I looked at 'em both and I was like
"Look, check this out toots, I'm lookin' for cookie pus"
I need to speak to 'em immediately
They played my video on MTV last week
And just when I was thinkin' I was all that and then some
In comes Fred Durst

(Fred Durst)
Yo Shady let me get some
Who knows what galaxy I came from
One where a bass drum hung from my high chair 
Now I'm a nightmare
You stay right there
I got the diva 
Hold the flavor of a single
See me and Shady?
I think we got a lock down
Shocked by the sound
I got you cruisin' with your top down
These two blondes
I offered 'em both a drink
And this you would think
Could get the party started
But instead them girls turned their heads
Opened up their mouths
Smelt like somebody farted
So if it's time for me to move on
Shady said the livin' room was a dance floor
So turn me loose
I was cuttin' the rug with this chick
Bumped into this dude who was drunk
And a prick 
Ramblin' on about how
He was gonna kill me
Wow!
I spilled a drink on his shirt
But no- He insisted we should go
Before I could drop 'em
Shady had to clock 'em
The music stopped
The party stood in shock
So I looked around
Grabbed the cutest girl and did the smurf

Turn me loose
Turn me loose
Turn me loose
Turn me loose
This party's goin' my way
Or no way at all
But don't you 
Turn me loose
Turn me loose
Turn me loose
This party's goin' my way
Or no way at all

(Eminem)
Turn me loose
You better tell 'em to come re-shingle the roof
Just keep feedin' me free drinks till I puke
And Fred'll ask me to lead sing in his group
I'm sick at the barn
I'm not bein' approached
Cuz Fred's over there stealin' all of my hoes
{Yo Fred save me some}
I walked up to these saimese twins
And asked to have a threesome
Told 'em two heads are better that one
Plus I respect how y'all roll together as one
Got a slap in the teeth and a kick in the groin 
Stood up like "Ay wait, where you goin" {bye!}
Oh well
Three strikes and I'm out
I struck out and stood tied to the road {ouch} 
I ain't tryin' no more
Fuck it- I'm chillin'
Get a shot of yable {ahhh}
Fell asleep on the ceiling 

(Fred Durst)
Who knows what galaxy I came from
One where a bass drum hung from my high chair 
Now I'm a nightmare
You stay right there
I got the diva 
Hold the flavor of a single
See me and Shady?
I think we got a lock down
Shocked by the sound
I got you cruisin' with your top down
These two blondes
I offered 'em both a drink
And this you would think
Could get the party started
But instead them girls turned their heads
Opened up their mouths
Smelt like somebody farted
So if it's time for me to move on
Shady said the livin' room was a dance floor
So turn me loose
I was cuttin' the rug with this chick
Bumped into this dude who was drunk
And a prick 
Ramblin' on about how
He was gonna kill me
Wow!
I spilled a drink on his shirt

Turn me loose
Turn me loose
Turn me loose
Turn me loose
This party's goin' my way
Or no way at all
But don't you 
Turn me loose
Turn me loose
Turn me loose
This party's goin' my way
Or no way at all