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No matter what I do
Or how I try
I can't redeem myself
Strip clean - pick up the pieces
Start over again
Who made the rules
Who decides
when I've made up
paid up
Ten months this time
twelve before
Few others could take much more
Do it right
How can I
When I'm not even given the chance
To correct the mistakes I've already made?
It's so hard to live up to standards
When you don't even know what they are
How can you expect me to change?
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I wouldn't speak my mind
I didn't want to make them mad
I looked up to them
for the courage I thought I didn't have
I never bothered to lift a finger to make my point
now I'm spelling it out
and nobody's listening
it's hard to take it to heart
it hurts to be apart
but I can't watch and not be heard
the days go by and things get worse
but they say they can only get better
I try to make a dent
but it blends in with all the damage
I try to look the other way
but there's a mirror behind me
I see images of what can be done
it seems like I'm the only one
I wouldn't speak my mind
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what can I say ?
why should I try ?
I tried to love
what I knew I hated
I took a lie and I made a truth
I defended
what I should have denied
I never gave a second thought
I followed blindly part of the lot
I never gave
I never gave a second thought
I followed blindly part of the lot
how can I say I'm really free?
how can I say I'm really me ?
what can I say ?
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I heard this
I heard that
what do I believe?
it's hard to give
it's hard to get
and once you've lost it it's always gone
I know I shouldn't accept
one person's word as truth
without at least
giving you the benefit of the doubt
I get so mixed up
by the things you say
and the way you act
too many times
this has happened before
I always thought the wrong thing
I never gave you a second chance
now it's happening all over again
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sometimes it gets so cloudy
it's hard to see
everything gets distorted
it's all a dream
all these smiling faces
have lost their shine
I guess I'm getting older
I just don't relate
never go back
I wish I could learn
to never go back
there's something wrong inside
but I will never release my pride
I wish I could learn to never go back
I'm looking at pictures
and I'm thinking of those times
those times have changed
and so have I
I stopped my dreaming
I know I can't go back
I started looking closer
and I know what it's become
I wish so bad it was the same
how could it ever be the same ?
never go back
never go back
I stopped my dreaming
I don't want to go back
I started looking closer
and I know what it's become
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we have tried and failed
we have stumbled and fallen
we have tried a new taste and spit it back out
we have taken a left turn when we meant to turn right
we lost sight of our origins
but our past never lost sight of us
it's not emulation - cause that's not this hard
not imitation - cause that won't take you far
not digression - cause I'm falling straight up
it is progression - I'm not afraid to stand up
I don't know what is expected
but I expected it to be great
I said "I'm trying my hardest"
but he didn't like the tape
take a look at what you're doing
and tell me I'm too late
you say we're walking backwards
well, that dead horse sure can run
the truth
I know I can
I know I will
I know -I know what I have to do
and now you'll listen
and I hope it won't hurt
I've seen your poison
you've done your worst
I've seen your better
and I can't believe it's true
you've lost the truth that used to live inside of you
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it's hard to hold
when the world is spinning
learned nothing from the night before
or the weeks before that
under your influence - right goes wrong
under your influence - crossed my mind
under your influence - right goes wrong
under your influence - you crossed my mind for the last time
twelve ounces of courage
makes the world look better
you love the attention
you never had it before
no safety comes from your numbers
nothing said or gained
shirking responsibility
true freedom from what?
from what?
(spoken part - you know I walked by you on the street the other day..
...you were going one way...I was going the other..
..and we both walked right by and we don't say a word..
... we used to be this close ..we used to be like brothers..
..but now 'cause of one time one word one phrase one time one word one phrase .. it's all over)
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you say it's the crossroads
the place we meet
all I'm seeing is a dead end street
think of where you're going
think of what you said
I used my heart 'till it was broken
now I'm trying to use my head we'll bide our time and there we'll stay
for you it's tomorrow for me it's yesterday
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I can last a lifetime
or be done with in a day
I can be picked up
I can be thrown away
hope that I can bounce back after each and every fall
I'm supposed to bounce back
I am a rubber ball
hope that I can bounce back after each and every fall
but it's easier to fall
I'm supposed to bounce back
I can't hit you hard enough to make you feel you're not alone
I can't touch you soft enough to make you feel you're flesh and bone
but I'll keep trying even though I'm not getting through
I'll keep trying
trying to get to you
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you say it's the crossroads
the place we meet
all I'm seeing is a dead end street
think of where you're going
think of what you said
I used my heart 'till it was broken
now I'm trying to use my head we'll bide our time and there we'll stay
for you it's tomorrow for me it's yesterday
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I understand you
you've got a problem
now understand me
it's your problem not mine
to find a reason, don't ask me
don't ask (anyone) for a reason to live your life
shake your head, left and right
like the old man who shows up here every night
what does he hear in this kind of music?
why don't you ask him?
find out what you need to know
all ages show
you haven't lived all there is to live
how old is old?
how old is old?
all ages show
I get the feeling that I've heard all this before
I spoke your words, I felt your feelings
but when I reached a dead end, I knew there was more
I guess I'm just too young to see it
but I've shorn* up some people
a little bit older
and they say the problems keep coming
but reasons to keep on trying keep growing
and they grow and they grow and they grow
all ages show
(* shorn = "slept with")
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one for all
nothing for one
and the more on your side
the better for them
they taught you your place
I can't even see your face
I don't understand
and I can't accept that you feel safer blending in with the rest
and it think it's sad
that I should have to ask
am I safe ?
if I don't want to be with you
did your new friends take the time to tell you what they're trying to prove
for the first time in your life people are afraid of you
and it makes me so mad
that I should have to ask
am I safe ?
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Came into town ready to play
But Matt said, "Sorry - the show's not today"
Went to some punks' house and heard GBH
But we were thrown out when their mother came home
Hopped in the Mule and drove through the swamps
Ran out of gas for the 15th time
Waited around, hitched a ride
We got a jug and put a gallon inside
Then we rode away on our yellow Mule
But Reardon f~cked up and we ran out of fuel
Went to McDonalds on a Wednesday night
My friends were bored, their conversation trite
But I had come for a bite of a filet-o-fish
Colin said that it couldn't be beat
Lost his appetite smelling Roger's feet
Played a lousy show in B-Town
But we got to watch Gitter's place burn down
We - we rode in on a Mule
O mais oui
We rode a Mule
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my dog's a cat
but he's really fat
and I shove him under the welcome mat
doesn't know where he's going to
and he doesn't know where he's been
. . .
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No matter what I say
Or how I try
I can't contain myself
Strip clean - pick up the pieces
Start over again
Who made the rules
Who decides
When I've made up
Paid up
Ten months this time
Twelve before
Few others could take much more
No matter what I say
Or how I try
I can't redeem myself
Strip clean - pick up the pieces
Start over again
Who made the rules
Who decides
When I've made up
Paid up
Ten months this time
Twelve before
Few others could take much more
Do it right
How can I
When I'm not even given the chance
To correct the mistakes already made?
So hard to live up to standards
When you don't even know what they are
How can you expect me to change?
. . .
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