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Bette Midler
Bette Midler


Background information
Born December 1, 1945
Born place Honolulu, Hawaii, United States
Genre(s) Vocal
Pop
Adult Contemporary
Comedy
Years active 1965—present
Label(s) Columbia Records
Atlantic Records
Associated acts Barry Manilow
Website Website



Music World  →  Lyrics  →  B  →  Bette Midler  →  Albums  →  Bathhouse Betty

Bette Midler Album


Bathhouse Betty (1998)
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There was a child named Bernadette
I heard the story long ago
She saw the queen of heaven once
And kept the vision in her soul
No one believed what she had seen
No one believed what she heard
That there were sorrows to be healed
And mercy, mercy in this world

So many hearts I find
Broke like yours and mine
Torn by what we've done and can't undo
I just want to hold you
Come on, let me hold you
Like Bernadette would do

We've been around, we fall, we fly
We mostly fall, we mostly run
And every now and then we try
To mend the damage that we've done
Tonight, tonight I just can't rest
I've got this joy right here inside my breast
To think that I did not forget
That child, that song of Bernadette

So many hearts I find
Broke like yours and mine
Torn by what we've done and can't undo
I just want to hold you
Come on, let me hold you
Like Bernadette would do

. . .


"That's it, baby! When you got it, flaunt it, flaunt it!"

"This is the Divine Miss M and I'm here to share with you some
rare and stimulating insight into my cosmic fabulosity.
It's really very simple. I smiply believe with all my heart:"

I'm beautiful, I'm beautiful, I'm beautiful, dammit!
I'm beautiful, I'm beautiful, I'm beautiful, dammit!
I'm beautiful, so beautiful, I'm beautiful, dammit!
I'm beautiful, I'm beautiful, I'm beautiful, dammit!

"Go away, little girl," they used to say.
"Hey, you're too fat, baby, you can't play."
"Hold on, miss thing, what you trying to do?
You know you're too wack to be in our school."

Too wack, too smart, too fast, too fine,
too loud, too tough, too too divine.
I said you don't belong. You don't belong.
Too loud, too big, too much to bear,
too bold, too brash, too prone to swear.
I heard that song for much too long.

Ain't this my sun? Ain't this my moon?
Ain't this my world to be who I choose?
Ain't this my song? Ain't this my movie?
Ain't this my world? I know I can do it.

I'm not too short, I'm not too tall,
I'm not too big, I'm not too small.
Ooh, don't lemme start lovin' myself!
Ooh, don't lemme start lovin' myself!
I'm not too white, I'm not too black,
I'm not too this, I'm not too that.
Ooh, don't lemme start lovin' myself!
Ooh, don't lemme start lovin' myself!

I'm beautiful, I'm beautiful, I'm beautiful, dammit!
I'm beautiful, I'm beautiful, I'm beautiful, dammit!

It's time to call it what it is. Don't play the naming game.
Become what you were born to be and be it unashamed.
"Go away, little boy," I can hear them say,
"Everybody on the block says they think you're gay.
Hold on, my friend, do you think we're blind?
Take a look at yourself. You're not our kind."

Too black, too white, too short, too tall,
too big, too green, too red, too small.
I said you don't belong. You don't belong.
Too black, too white, too short, too tall,
too blue, too green, too red, too small.
I heard that song for much to long.

Ain't this my sun? Ain't this my moon?
Ain't this my world to be who I choose?
Ain't this my song? Ain't this my movie?
Ain't this my world? I know I can do it.

People always ask me,
"Miss M, how did you get so far
on so little?" Shut up!
Well, I woke up one morning,
flossed my teeth and decided,
"Damn, I'm fierce!" You look good!
You can be just like me! A goddess? Yeah!
Don't just pussy foot around and sit on your assets.
Unleash your ferocity upon an unsuspecting world.
Rise up and repeat after me: "I'm beautiful!"

I'm beautiful, I'm beautiful, I'm beautiful!
Can you say that?
I'm beautiful, I'm beautiful, I'm beautiful!
I don't hear you!
I'm beautiful, I'm beautiful, I'm beautiful!
Louder!
I'm beautiful, I'm beautiful, I'm beautiful!
Hey!

That's it, baby, when you got it, flaunt it, flaunt it!

Aaaaaah!
Ain't this my sun? My sun! Ain't this my moon? My moon!
Ain't this my world to be who I choose?
Ain't this our song? Ain't this our song?
Ain't this our movie? Ain't this our movie?
Ain't this our world to be who we choose?

I'm not too short, I'm not too tall,
I'm not too big, I'm not too small.
Ooh, don't lemme start lovin' myself!
Ooh, don't lemme start lovin' myself!
I'm not too white, I'm not too black,
I'm not too this, I'm not too that.
Ooh, don't lemme start lovin' myself!
Ooh, don't lemme start lovin' myself!
I'm beautiful, dammit!

. . .


I know that I'm no saint
My head is in the clouds
They called you a mistake
But I still say your name out loud
They called me a stupid girl
Just like my mom
Too many men passed through my arms
At seventeen I looked into your eyes
Knew I could never comfort your cries
Every April still reminds me of you
The child I never knew
My lullaby in blue

It all goes by so fast
How lovely you must be
Why you've reached the age at last
That I was when your daddy lived with me
How I wish we could meet somewhere
Talk it through
There is so much I would say to you
There are others, I'm not alone
A younger brother you've never known
And a baby girl who so reminds me of you
The child I never knew
My lullaby in blue

As the years go by
Try not to think of us sadly
Believe it if you can
I want to see you so badly
On your birthday, Mama's thinking of you
The child I never knew
My lullaby in blue
My lullaby in blue
My lullaby

. . .


I saw the splendor of the moonlight on Honolulu Bay
There's something tender in the moonlight on Honolulu Bay
And all the beaches are full of peaches
Who bring their ukes along
And in the glimmer of the moonlight
They love to sing this song

If you like a ukulele lady
Ukulele lady like a you
If you want to linger where it's shady
Ukulele lady linger too
If you kiss a ukulele lady
While you promise ever to be true
And she see another ukulele lady fool around with you
Maybe she'll sigh, maybe she'll cry
Maybe she will find somebody else
By and by
To sing to when it's cool and shady
Where the tricky wicky wackies woo
If you like a ukulele lady
Ukulele lady like a you

Someday I'm going
Where eyes are glowing
And lips were made to kiss
To see somebody in the moonlight
And to hear the songs I missed

If you like a ukulele lady
Ukulele lady like a you, you, you
If want to linger where it's shady
Ukulele lady linger too
If you kiss a ukulele lady
While you promise ever to be true, true, true
And she see another ukulele lady fool around with you
Well, maybe she will sigh
Maybe she will cry
Aaah, but maybe she will find somebody else
By and by
To sing to when it's cool and shady
Where the tricky wicky wackies woo, woo, woo
If you like a ukulele lady
Ukulele lady like a you like a me like I like a you
And we like a both the same
I'd like to say this very day
Ukulele lady like a you

. . .


I'm hip
I'm no square
I'm alert, I'm awake, I'm aware
I am always on the scene
Makin' the rounds
Diggin' the sounds
I read People Magazine
'Cause I'm hip

Like, dig!
I'm in step
When it was hip to be hep
I was hep
I don't blow but I'm a fan
Look at me swing
Ring a ding ding
I even call my girlfriend "man"
'Cause I'm hip

Every Satuday night
With my suit buttoned tight and my swedes on
I'm gettin' my kicks
Diggin' arty French flickes with my shades on
I'm too much
I'm a gas
I am anything but middle class
When I hang around the band
Poppin' my thumbs
Diggin' the drums
Squares don't seem to understand
Why I flip
They're not hip
Like I'm hip
I'm hip!

I'm on top of every trend
Look at me go
Vo-dee-o-do
Sammy Davis knew my friend (sobbing)

I'm hip
But not weird
Like you notice I don't wear a beard
Beards were in but now they're out
They had their day
Now their passe
Just ask me if you're in doubt
'Cause I'm hip

Now I'm deep into Zen
Meditation and macrobiotics
And as soon as I can
I intend to get into narcotics
'Cause I'm cool as a cuke
I'm a cat, I'm a card, I'm a kook, kook, kook
I get so much out of life
Really, i do
Skoo ba dee boo
One more time play "Mack the Knife"
Let 'er rip
I may flip
But I'm hip

. . .


I gave my heart to you
The one that I trusted
You brought it back to me
All broken and busted
So I sold my heart to the junkman
And I'll never fall in love again

You took my heart
Because you thought you could use it
Just like a little toy
You battered and bruised it
So I sold my heart to the junkman
And I'll never fall in love again

Like a melodrama
In a simple manner
Love played the leading part
We planned a happy ending
Now I'm left with a broken heart
I'll throw away my pride
And say we'll be friends, dear
Teardrops I just can't hide
'Cause this is the end, dear
So I sold my heart to the junkman
And I'll never fall in love again

. . .


My baby jumped up this morning
Sat on the side of the bed
He said "I'm leaving you, baby"
And this is just what I said
I said, "I can't make you stay
If you want to go"
But it's high time baby
That you should know

One monkey don't stop no show
One monkey don't stop no show
So if you still wanna go, go ahead
And I mean every word I said

My baby though I was jivin'
And he went right out the door
He left me about three in the morning
I got me a man at four
Some women cry when their men bleed them
Dry, long and slow
But I found out something a long time ago

One monkey don't stop no show
One monkey don't stop no show
So if he gets too big for his pants
You better spring that new one and give him a chance

I used to be chicken hearted
Cry when he'd walk out the door
'Cause I was just young and stupid
Ha! Aint' like that no more
'Cause I had a hard way to go
But I learned the score
And I'm here to tell you
And I should know

One monkey don't stop no show
One monkey don't stop no show
Let him do anything he choose
There's a million men who could fill his shoes

One monkey don't stop no show
One monkey don't stop no show
One monkey don't stop no show
You can tell him I told you so

. . .


Howard, the strangest things
have happened lately when I
take a good swing
and all my dreams
they pivot and slip.
I drop my fists
and they're back, laughing.

Howard, my intentions
become not to lose what I've won.
Ambition has given way
to desperation and I,
I've lost the fight from my eyes.

Boxing's been good to me, Howard.
Now I'm told,
"You're growing old."
The whole time we knew
a couple of years I'd be through.
Has boxing been good to you?

Howard, now I confess
I'm scared and lonely and tired.
Everyone says I'm made of clay,
that I've had my day,
that I'm not cut out for this.
I just know what to say.
And I say,

boxing's been good to me, Howard.
Now I'm told,
"You're growing old."
The whole time we knew
a couple of years I'd be through.
Has boxing been good to you?

Well, sometimes I punch myself
hard as I can.
Yelling, "nobody cares!"
hoping someone will tell me how wrong I am,
Howard.

Boxing's been good to me, Howard.
Now I'm told,
"You're growing old."
The whole time we knew
a couple of years I'd be through.
Has boxing been good,
has boxing been good,
has boxing been good?

. . .


Mmmmmm, you talk about you and only you
and the things that you do for you.
You say you're not a lean cuisine.
So I wanna see whatcha got on the menu.

Now, if you think you're the man the only man
with an exterior you feel is superior,
just give Miss B a little peek
and see if you really can deliver.

Your tendencies are short, my expectations are long.
And as I see it now, there's not much to go on.
It seems you dug a hole that you can't crawl out.
Now I truly see what you're all about.

Don't brag about the diamond rings
or the expensive clothes you wear,
'cause I could care less for what you possess
and your attitude needs repair.
Don't brag about your body, baby,
and say that you're packin' a lot,
'cause all I see besides your big feet
is that you got big socks.

Let's just say that there's something lackin'.
A flea shouldn't have the nerve to be braggin'.
So pack up your little gift and get to steppin'.
Return it back and put it in the kiddie section.

Full figured in a place that can deliver?
Ha ha, not from what I've seen.
I can't trace what's below your waist.
There's too much space to be inside those jeans.

Don't brag about the diamond rings
or the expensive clothes you wear,
'cause I could care less for what you possess
and your attitude needs repair.
Don't brag about your body, baby,
and say that you're packin' a lot,
'cause all I see besides your big feet
is that you got big socks.

Bye bye, baby, bye bye.
It's time to wave the white flag
now that the kitten has been let out the bag.

Don't brag about the diamond rings
or the expensive clothes you wear,
'cause I could care less for what you possess
and your attitude needs repair.
Don't brag about your body, baby,
and say that you're packin' a lot,
'cause all I see besides your big feet
is that you got big socks.

Don't brag about the diamond rings
or the expensive clothes you wear,
'cause I could care less for what you possess
and your attitude needs repair.
Don't brag about your body, baby,
and say that you're packin' a lot,
'cause all I see besides your big feet
is that you got big socks.

. . .


Oooooh. Oooh-hoooh.
Ooooo-hoooh.
It's such a mystery
how he found something in me
that I never knew was there.
He uncovered it so easily.
He turned me like a season
and I began to change.
He wrapped himself all around me,
now I'll never be the same.

That's how love works.
That's how love moves.
Like a river running through you.
Sometimes it lifts you
as high as Heaven.
It consumes you, that's a given.
That's how love moves.
Ohh, that's how love moves.

I've seen walls that could never be broken
come a-tumblin' down, oh yes I have.
I've heard the voice of love calling
without making a sound.
See, I was touched by an angel
the day he took my hand.
I know that he's the miracle
that makes me eveything I am.

That's how love works.
That's how love moves.
Like a river running through you.
Sometimes it lifts you
as high as Heaven.
It consumes you, that's a given.
That's how love moves.
Ohh, that's how love moves.
Woah, love.

Sometimes it's a whisper,
oh, sometimes it's a storm,
sometimes it reaches forever
with it's everlasting arms.

That's how love works.
That's how love moves.
Like a river running through you.
Sometimes it lifts you
high as Heaven.
It consumes you, yeah, that's a given.

Ohhhhhhh!
That's how love works.
That's how love moves.
Like a river, yeah, like a river
running through you, running through your heart and soul.
Sometimes it lifts you
as high as Heaven.
Heaven!
It consumes you, that's a given.

That's how love works. That's how love works.
That's how love moves. That's how love moves.
Like a river running through you. Like a river running through your heart and soul.
Sometimes it lifts you
as high as Heaven. Heaven!
It consumes you, that's a given.
That's how love moves.

That's how love moves.
That's how love moves.
That's how love moves.
That's how, that's how, that's how.
That's how love moves.
That's how love moves.

. . .


And now, is it too late to say
How you made my life so different in your quiet way?
I can see the joy in simple things,
a sunlit sky and all the songs we used to sing.

I have walked and I have I prayed.
I could forgive and we could start again.
In the end,
you are my one true friend.

For all, all the times you closed your eyes,
allowing me to stumble or to be surprised,
by life, with all its twists and turns.
I made mistakes, you always knew that I would learn.

And when I left, it's you who stayed.
You always knew that I'd come home again.
In the end,
you are my one true friend.

Though love may break, it never dies.
It changes shape, through changing eyes.
What I denied, I now can see.
You always were the light inside of me.

I know, I know, I know, I know it was you.

I have walked and I have I prayed.
I could forgive and we could start again.
In the end, you are my one true friend.

My one true friend.
I always, always knew,
I always knew that it was you,
my one true friend.


. . .


Live at five and CNN
Keep us all abreast
Of breaking stories that can tend
To make us anxious and depressed
Problems with no answers
Hang on like some chronic cough
And everyday some some brand new issue
Rears it head to piss you off

Bad guys win
Optimism's wearing thin
Things are spinning out of control
Cynicism's all the fad
World events could make us mad as hatters
Almost everyday, some underpinning slips away
These aren't laughing matters

Time bombs tick
People keep on getting sick
And a nickel's not worth a cent
Wickedness and greed abound
Just as peace is gaining grounds it shatters
Hate is here to stay
And justice goes to those who pay
Friends, these aren't laughing matters

The truth is scarier by far
Than anything that Stephen King could write
The stories in the paper are
The daily small, decline and fall
Spelled out in black and white
Oh what to do, what to do
How to take a brighter view
When your noodle's totally fried
Human spirits need to be
Leavened by a little levity
So take those blues and bounce them off the wall
Keep your humor, please
Cause don't you know it's times like these that
Laughing matters most of all

. . .


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