Ani DiFranco Album

I'm cradling the softest, warmest part of you in my hands 
Feels like a little baby bird 
Fallen from the nest
I think that your body is something I understand
I think that I'm happy
I think that I'm blessed

But I've had a lack of inhibition
I've had a loss of perspective
I've had a little bit to drink 
And it's making me think 
That I can jump ship and swim 
That the ocean will hold me
That there's got to be more
Than this boat I'm in

They can call me crazy if I fail
All the chance that I need is one-in-a-million, 
And they can call me brilliant if I succeed
Gravity is nothing to me
I'm moving at the speed of sound
I'm just gonna to get my feet wet until I drown

I teeter between tired 
And really, really tired 
I'm wiped and I'm wired
But I guess that's just as well
Cuz I've built my own empire 
Out of car tires and chicken wire 
And now I'm queen of my own compost heap 
And I'm getting used to the smell

I've had a lack of information
I've had a little revelation 
I'm climbing up on the railing 
Trying not to look down
I'm going to do my best swan dive 
In the shark-infested waters
I'm gonna pull out my tampon 
And start splashing around

Cuz I don't care if they eat me alive
I've got better things to do than survive
I've got the memory of your warm skin in my hands
And I've got a vision of blue sky and dry land

I'm cradling the hardest, heaviest part of me in my hands 
The ship is pitching and heaving
Our limbs are bobbing and weaving 
I think this is something I understand
I just need a couple vaccinations
For my far-away vacation
I'm going to go ahead and go boldly 
Cuz a little bird told me 
That jumping is easy
That falling is fun 
Right up until you hit the sidewalk
Shivering stunned

They can call me crazy if I fail 
All the chance that I need is one-in-a-million
And they can call me brilliant if I succeed
Gravity is nothing to me 
I'm moving at the speed of sound
I'm just gonna get my feet wet untill I drown

Don't ask me why I'm crying
I'm not going to tell you what's wrong
I'm just gonna sit on your lap
For five dollars a song
I want you to pay me for my beauty
I think it's only right
'Cause I have been paying for it
All of my life

I'm gonna take the money I make
I'm gonna take the money I make
I'm gonna take the money I make
And I'm gonna go away...

We barely have time to react in this world
Let alone rehearse
And I don't think I'm better than you
But I don't think that I'm worse
Women learn to be women
And men learn to be men
And I don't blame it all on you
But I don't want to be your friend

I'm gonna take the money I make
I'm gonna take the money I make
I'm gonna take the money I make
And I'm gonna go away...

I was eleven years old
He was as old as my dad
And he took something from me
I didn't even know that I had
So don't tell me about decency
Don't tell me about pride
Just give me something for my trouble
'Cause this time, it's not a free ride

I'm gonna take the money I make
I'm gonna take the money I make
I'm gonna take the money I make
And I'm gonna go away...

Don't ask me why I'm crying
I'm not going to tell you what's wrong
I'm just gonna sit on your lap
For five dollars a songs
I want you to pay me for my beauty
I think it's only right
'Cause I have been paying for it
All of my life

Now I just wanna take
And I'm just gonna take
I'm gonna take

The sky is grey, the sand is grey, and the ocean is grey. 
I feel right at home in this stunning monochrome, alone in my way. 
I smoke and I drink and every time I blink I have a tiny dream. 
But as bad as I am I'm proud of the fact that I'm worse than I seem. 
What kind of paradise am I looking for? 
I've got everything I want and still I want more. 
Maybe some tiny shiny thing will wash up on the shore. 
You walk through my walls like a ghost on TV
You penetrate me and my little pink heart is on its little brown raft floating out to sea. 
And what can I say but I'm wired this way and you're wired to me
And what can I do but wallow in you unintentionally? 
What kind of paradise am I looking for?
I've got everything I want and still I want more. 
Maybe some tiny shiny key will wash up on the shore. 
Regretfully, I guess I've got three simple things to say. 
Why me? Why this now? Why this way? 
Overtone's ringing, undertow's pulling away under a sky that is grey on sand 
That is grey by an ocean that's grey. 
What kind of paradise am I looking for? 
I've got everything I want and still I want more. 
Maybe some tiny shiny key will wash up on the shore.

Fourteenth street and the garbage swirls like a cyclone
Three-o-clock in the afternoon 
And I am going home
F-train is full of high school students
So much shouting, so much laughter
Last night's underwear 
In my back pocket
Sure sign of the morning after

Take me home
Take me home and leave me there
Think I'm going to cry, don't know why
Think I'm going to sing myself a lullaby
Feel free to listen
Feel free to stare

I live in New York, New York 
City that never shuts up
In the daylight everything is so gory
You can hear snatches of stranger's sorry stories
And I moved there from buffalo 
But that's nothing
The trico plant moved to Mexico
Left my uncle standing out in the cold
Said there's your last paycheck 
Have fun growing old

Take me home
Take me home and leave me there
Think I'm going to cry, don't know why
Think I'm going to sing myself a lullaby
Feel free to listen
Feel free to stare

Rockabye baby
In the treetop
When the wind blows
The cradle will rock
When the bough breaks
The cradle will fall
Down will come baby
Cradle and all

Youth is beauty
Money is beauty
Hell, beauty is beauty sometimes
It's the luck of the draw
It's the natural law
It's a joke, it's a crime
I was bored
You were bored
It was a meeting of the minds
Now it's three in the afternoon 
And I can't leave too soon
Saying, thank you I had a nice time

Take me home
Take me home and leave me there
Think I'm going to cry, don't know why
Think I'm going to sing myself a lullaby
Feel free to listen
Feel free to stare

Maybe I'll live my whole life
Just getting by
Maybe I'll be discovered
Maybe I'll be colonized
You can try to train me like a pet
You can try to teach me to behave
But I'll tell you, if I haven't learned it yet
You know,
I ain't gonna sit
I ain't gonna stay

Take me home
Take me home and leave me there
Think I'm going to cry, I don't know why
Think I'm going to sing myself a lullaby
Feel free to listen
Feel free to stare

Today we are only whatall is nice about us
Today we turned on in the blue light of dawn
And made love

And you were not a dot dot dot
Waiting for me to complete you
And it was like I just forgot
To measure everything that I do

We woke up with the notion
That enough is not enough without more
And then we pushed with one motion
Like the ocean heaves a wave at the shore

And you were not a dot dot dot
Leaning forward expectantly
And I was not in such a rush
To insure my autonomy

Today we are only whatall is nice about us

The sun is settin on the century
And we are armed to the teeth
We are all working together now
To make our lives mercifully brief
Schoolkids keep trying to teach us
What guns are all about
Confuse liberty with weaponry
And watch your kids act it out
Every year now like Christmas
Some boy gets the mildfed surburban blues
Reaches for the avaliable aresenal
And saunters off to make the news
And women in the middle
Are learning what poor women have always known
That the edge is closer than you think
When your men bring the guns home

Look at where the profits are
That's how you'll find the source
Of the big lie that you and i
Both know so well
It the time it takes this cultural
Death wish to run its course
They're gonna make a pretty penny
And then they're all going to hell
He said the chickens all come home to roost
Yeah, malcom forecasted this flood
Are we really gonna sleep through another century
While the rich profir off our blood?
True, it may take some doing
To see this undoing done
But in my humble opinion
Here's what I suggest we do:

Open fire on hollywood
Open fire on MTV
Open fire on NBC
And CBS and ABC
Open fire on the NRA
And all the lies they told us
Along the way
Open fire on each weapons manufacturer
While he's giving head
To some republician senator

And if I hear one more time
About fool's rights
To his tools of rage
I'm gonna take all my friends
And I'm gonna move to canada
And we're gonna die of old age

You were so in love
That it was all you could talk about
And I think I felt a little left out
You were on cloud 9 all the time
Ehile I was levelling
I was wringing my hands and you were revelling

But then why shouldn't you?
It was such a beautiful thing to do

Would that I could get me some of your yum yum delirium
I could level off the ground that we stand on
But with you down on bended knee
Always looking up at me
That feeling of standing up together is gone

And though I love you through all time and space
My love always seems to take second place

You were so in love
That it was all you could talk about
And I think I felt a little left out
You were on cloud 9 all the time
While I was levelling
I was wringing my hands and you were revelling

But then why shouldn't you?
It was such a beautiful thing to do

what's with that halo
hovering
above that thick skull
serenading
if i do say so
i think you're covering
course there was nothing
could have prepared me
for the side effect
of this dirty drug
the way you punish me
and then you shrug

what's with that phone call baby
it's like you're trying
just trying to crush me
do you feel stronger
each time you push me dear
did you tell your mom
you carpet bombed
before you left here
and is it just the side effect of this
dirty drug
that does each apology (that tempts you to punish me?)
the more i shrug

are you at home now
with your kitty cats
are you just at home now
with the way that you act
do you split the rent there
with all your secrets
or do you just pretend
to all your friends
they're uninvited guests

when you want to tie to me? (hold me tightly??)
can you still dispell me
sweep me neatly under the rug
and does your conscience ever mention
the way that you treat me
or do you just fend it off
with a.....

welcome to...
no amount of snow can make you feel okay
and welcome to...
this year's alone brought to you by Christmas day
and welcome to...
the darkness into which prayin' people pray

yeah it's quiet here except for this song
now that everybody's gone
hey hey hey hey hey at least you don't have to play along today 
you don't have to play along

welcome to...
something like elation when you first open your eyes
just cuz it means that you must have finally got to sleep last night
welcome to... 
the precipice between groundlessness and flight

yeah it's quiet here except for this song
now that everybody's gone
hey hey hey hey hey at least you don't have to play along today
you don't have to play along
no you don't have to play along
you don't have to play along

besides which, welcome to... 
taking the good stuff down off of the shelf
welcome to...
the art of conversation with yourself
and welcome to...
humming half of a broken tune all day long

and it's quiet here

hey hey hey hey hey least you don't have to play along today
no you don't have to play along
no you don't have to play along

hey hey hey hey hey hey hey hey hey
hey hey hey hey hey hey hey hey hey 
hey hey hey hey hey hey hey hey hey 
hey hey hey hey hey hey hey hey hey

I love you and you love me 
And ain't that that way it's supposed to be?
I swing my stick legs 'round from the root 
And I pile drive each foot into a platform boot. 
And I'm up and I'm out cuz I'm bouncing off the walls. 
And I come when you call and you call. 
I got a super cute three piece suit. 
One piece for your body. 
One piece for your smile. 
One more little piece if you stay a while. 
Yeah, cuz I love you and you love me. 
Ain't that the way it's supposed to be? 
I gotta beeline double time. 
Leave my home sweet home for your honeycomb. 
Then I show up steady ready and proud and I find I've forgotten how to talk out loud. 
Isn't it just like you to bring me to my knees in my brand new stockings 
While the cat is out with my tongue. 
Isn't it just like you to bring me to my knees in my brand new stockings. 
Love makes me feel so dumb.
Cuz I love you and you love me and ain't that the way it's supposed to be?
Yeah, cuz I love you and you love the me. 
Ain't that the way it's supposed to be?

Life used to be life-like
Now it's more like showbiz
I wake up in the night
And I don't know where the bathroom is
And I don't know what town I'm in
Or what sky I am under
And I wake up in the darkness and I
Don't have the will anymore to wonder
Everyone has a skeleton
And a closet to keep it in
And your mine
Every song has a you
A you that the singer sings to
And you're it this time
Baby, you're it this time

When I need to wipe my face
I use the back of my hand
And I like to take up space
Just because I can
And I use my dress
To wipe up my drink
I care less and less
What people think
And you are so lame
You always dissapoint me
It's kind of like our running joke
But it's really not funny
And I just want you to live up to
The image of you I create
I see you and I'm so unsatisfied
I see you and I dilate

So I'll walk the plank
And I'll jump with a smile
If I'm gonna go down
I'm gonna do it with style
And you won't see me surrender
You won't hear me confess
'Cuz you've left me with nothing
But I've worked with less
And I learn every room long enough
To make it to the door
And then I hear it click shut behind me
And every key works differently
I forget everytime
And forgetting defines me
That's what defines me

When I say you sucked my brain out
The English translation is I am in love with you
And it is no fun
But I don't use words like love
'Cuz works like that don't matter
But don't look so offended
You know, you should be flattered
And I wake up in the night
In some big hotel bed
And my hands grope for the light
And my hands grope for my head
The world is my oyster
The road is my home
And I know that I'm better
Off alone

Thank you for letting me stay here
Thank you for taking me in
Thank you for the beer and the food
Thank you for loaning me bus fare
Thank you for showing me around
That was a very kind thing to do
Thank you for the use of the clean towel
Thank you for half of your bed
We can sleep here like brother and sister, you said

But you changed the rules in an hour or two
And I don't know what you and your sisters do
But please don't 
Please stop
This is not my obligation
What does my body have to do
With my gratitude?

Look at you
Little white lying
For the purpose of justifying
What you're trying to do
I know that you feel my resistance
I know that you heard what I said
Otherwise you wouldn't need the excuse

Thank you
For letting me stay here
Thank you for taking me in
I don't know where else
I would have turned
But I don't come and go
Like a pop song
That you can play incessantly
And then foget when it's gone
You can't write me off
And you don't turn me on

So don't change the rules in an hour or two
I don't know what you and your sisters do
But please don't
Please stop
This is not my obligation

It's rock paper scissors as to whether I will get over you at all. 
It's hand against hand and both hands are mine. 
It's standing in a circular line, which is not to say that I'm not also happy. 
A happy meal with a surprise inside. 
Surprise, surprise is another bright light in my eyes
Exposing all the stuff I'm not calculating enough to hide. 
This melancholy that I carry makes me feel so grown up at the kitchen table doing shots of resignation. 
I never thought I'd see the day 
When I would I say I give up and tame the stallions of my wildest expectations. 
But I do not want to know you this way, surrounded by so much pain.
But how am I supposed to let go of you this way, like a bird into the sky of my brain? 
I think I could accept all these dark colors as just part of some bigger color scheme 
If it wasn't for that drippy string quartet of sadness underscoring each smiling scene.
Yeah desire drags me right out of myself like a gas soaked rope tied to a piece of coal. 
And I'm getting pretty good at looking at the bright side
While the flames ripple on the sand and swallow me whole. 
But this melancholy that I carry makes me feel so grown up at my kitchen table doing shots of resignation. 
I never thought I'd see the day 
When I would say I give up and break the stallions of my wildest expectations. 
But I do not want to know you this way surrounded by so much pain
But how am I supposed to let go of you this way like a bird into the sky of my brain.

Squint your eyes and look closer
I'm not between you and your ambition
I am a poster girl with no poster
I am thirty-two flavors and then some
And I'm beyond your peripheral vision
So you might want to turn your head
Cuz someday you're going to get hungry
And eat most of the words you just said

Both my parents taught me about good will
And I have done well by their names
Just the kindness i've lavished on strangers
Is more than I can explain
Still there's many 
Who've turned out their porch lights
Just so I would think they were not home
And hid in the dark of their windows
Til I'd passed and left them alone

And god help you if you are an ugly girl
Cause too pretty is also your doom
Cuz everyone harbors a secret hatred
For the prettiest girl in the room
And god help you if you are a phoenix
And you dare to rise up from the ash
A thousand eyes will smolder with jealousy
While you are just flying past

I never tried to give my life meaning
By demeaning you
And I would like to state for the record
I did everything that I could do
I'm not saying that i'm a saint
I just don't want to live that way
No, I will never be a saint
But I will always say

Squint your eyes and look closer
I'm not between you and your ambition
I am a poster girl with no poster
I am thirty-two flavors and then some
And I'm beyond your peripheral vision
So you might want to turn your head
Cuz someday you might find you're starving
And eating all of the words you said

You always got those dark sunglasses 
Covering up your face
But if you promise to take them off 
I promise I won't squander your gaze 
I will be picturesque
I will be nice
I won't do anything 
You can't tell your wife
I will think before I act
I will think twice
Just let me see your eyes

Each time we've spoke 
We've put in our token 
And ridden the tilt-a-whirl
And I was giggling and dizzy 
Flirting like a 12 year old girl
The carnival of you and me is coming to town
Watch how we spin and spin
And then fall down 
Now we just say hello 
And head for firmer ground 

You are the one-way glass that watches me 
Standing in line at the bank
I always looked into your glasses 
Like a cat looks into a fish tank
But all I could ever see was the specter of me reflected
I want a monument of friendship 
That we never had, erected 
I want it to take up lots of room
I want it to loom

You always got those dark sunglasses 
Between us when we talk
But after the party is over
If you wanna take a walk 
We could just look around not do nothing wrong
Just try to be at least as brave as our songs
I will bring my heart
I will bring my face 
Just name the time and place

You crawled into my bed like some sort of giant insect 
And I found myself spellbound that night at the sight of you there, 
Beautiful and grotesque and all the rest of that bug stuff 
Fluttering your way into my mouth, 
Behind my teeth, reaching for my scars. 
That night we got kicked out of two bars and laughed our way home. 
That night you leaned over and threw up into your hair. 
And I held you there thinking I would offer you my pulse 
If I thought it would be useful. 
I would give you my breath except the problem with death 
Is you have some hundred years and then they can build 
Buildings on our only bones. 
A hundred years and then your 
Grave is not your own. 
We lie in our beds and in our graves unable to save 
Ourselves from the quaint tragedies we invent, 
And then undo from the stupid circumstances we slalom through. 
And I realized that night that the hall light which seemed so 
Bright when you turned it on is nothing compared to the dawn, 
Which is nothing compared to the light which seeps from me 
While you're sleeping beautiful and grotesque, 
Resting cocooned in my room beautiful and grotesque,
Resting. 
That night we got kicked out of two bars and laughed our way 
Home and I held you there thinkin' I would offer you my pulse. 
I would give you my breath. 
I would offer you my pulse. 

I am not a pretty girl
That is not what I do
I ain't no damsel in distress
And I don't need to be rescued
So put me down punk
Wouldn't you prefer a maiden fair
Isn't there a kitten 
Stuck up a tree somewhere

I am not an angry girl
But it seems like
I've got everyone fooled
Every time I say something 
They find hard to hear
They chalk it up to my anger
And never to their own fear
And imagine you're a girl
Just trying to finally come clean
Knowing full well they'd prefer 
You were dirty 
And smiling

And I am sorry
I am not a maiden fair
And I am not a kitten 
Stuck up a tree somewhere

And generally my generation
Wouldn't be caught dead 
Working for the man
And generally I agree with them
Trouble is you gotta have yourself 
An alternate plan
I have earned my disillusionment
I have been working all of my life
And I am a patriot
I have been fighting the good fight
And what if there are
No damsels in distress
What if I knew that
And I called your bluff
Don't you think every kitten 
Figures out how to get down
Whether or not you ever show up

I am not a pretty girl
I don't really want to be a pretty girl
I want to be more than a pretty girl

(inspired by the WTC disaster)

yes, 
us people are just poems 
we're 90% metaphor 
with a leanness of meaning 
approaching hyper-distillation 
and once upon a time 
we were moonshine 
rushing down the throat of a giraffe 
yes, rushing down the long hallway 
despite what the p.a. announcement says 
yes, rushing down the long stairs 
with the whiskey of eternity 
fermented and distilled 
to eighteen minutes 
burning down our throats 
down the hall 
down the stairs 
in a building so tall 
that it will always be there 
yes, it's part of a pair 
there on the bow of Noah's ark 
the most prestigious couple 
just kickin back parked 
against a perfectly blue sky 
on a morning beatific 
in its Indian summer breeze 
on the day that America 
fell to its knees 
after strutting around for a century 
without saying thank you 
or please 

and the shock was subsonic 
and the smoke was deafening 
between the setup and the punch line 
cuz we were all on time for work that day 
we all boarded that plane for to fly 
and then while the fires were raging 
we all climbed up on the windowsill 
and then we all held hands 
and jumped into the sky 

and every borough looked up when it heard the first blast 
and then every dumb action movie was summarily surpassed 
and the exodus uptown by foot and motorcar 
looked more like war than anything I've seen so far 
so far 
so far 
so fierce and ingenious 
a poetic specter so far gone 
that every jackass newscaster was struck dumb and stumbling 
over 'oh my god' and 'this is unbelievable' and on and on 
and I'll tell you what, while we're at it 
you can keep the pentagon 
keep the propaganda 
keep each and every TV 
that's been trying to convince me 
to participate 
in some prep school punk's plan to perpetuate retribution 
perpetuate retribution 
even as the blue toxic smoke of our lesson in retribution 
is still hanging in the air 
and there's ash on our shoes 
and there's ash in our hair 
and there's a fine silt on every mantle 
from hell's kitchen to Brooklyn 
and the streets are full of stories 
sudden twists and near misses 
and soon every open bar is crammed to the rafters 
with tales of narrowly averted disasters 
and the whiskey is flowin 
like never before 
as all over the country 
folks just shake their heads 
and pour 

so here's a toast to all the folks who live in Palestine 
Afghanistan 
Iraq 

El Salvador 

here's a toast to the folks living on the pine ridge reservation 
under the stone cold gaze of mt. Rushmore 

here's a toast to all those nurses and doctors 
who daily provide women with a choice 
who stand down a threat the size of Oklahoma City 
just to listen to a young woman's voice 

here's a toast to all the folks on death row right now 
awaiting the executioner's guillotine 
who are shackled there with dread and can only escape into their heads 
to find peace in the form of a dream 

cuz take away our playstations 
and we are a third world nation 
under the thumb of some blue blood royal son 
who stole the oval office and that phony election 
I mean 
it don't take a weatherman 
to look around and see the weather 
Jeb said he'd deliver Florida, folks 
and boy did he ever 

and we hold these truths to be self evident: 
#1 George W. Bush is not president 
#2 America is not a true democracy 
#3 the media is not fooling me 
cuz I am a poem heeding hyper-distillation 
I've got no room for a lie so verbose 
I'm looking out over my whole human family 
and I'm raising my glass in a toast 

here's to our last drink of fossil fuels 
let us vow to get off of this sauce 
shoo away the swarms of commuter planes 
and find that train ticket we lost 
cuz once upon a time the line followed the river 
and peeked into all the backyards 
and the laundry was waving 
the graffiti was teasing us 
from brick walls and bridges 
we were rolling over ridges 
through valleys 
under stars 
I dream of touring like Duke Ellington 
in my own railroad car 
I dream of waiting on the tall blonde wooden benches 
in a grand station aglow with grace 
and then standing out on the platform 
and feeling the air on my face 

give back the night its distant whistle 
give the darkness back its soul 
give the big oil companies the finger finally 
and relearn how to rock-n-roll 
yes, the lessons are all around us and a change is waiting there 
so it's time to pick through the rubble, clean the streets 
and clear the air 
get our government to pull its big dick out of the sand 
of someone else's desert 
put it back in its pants 
and quit the hypocritical chants of 
freedom forever 

cuz when one lone phone rang 
in two thousand and one 
at ten after nine 
on nine one one 
which is the number we all called 
when that lone phone rang right off the wall 
right off our desk and down the long hall 
down the long stairs 
in a building so tall 
that the whole world turned 
just to watch it fall 

and while we're at it 
remember the first time around? 
the bomb? 
the Ryder truck? 
the parking garage? 
the princess that didn't even feel the pea? 
remember joking around in our apartment on avenue D? 

can you imagine how many paper coffee cups would have to change their design 
following a fantastical reversal of the New York skyline?! 

it was a joke, of course 
it was a joke 
at the time 
and that was just a few years ago 
so let the record show 
that the FBI was all over that case 
that the plot was obvious and in everybody's face 
and scoping that scene 
religiously 
the CIA 
or is it KGB? 
committing countless crimes against humanity 
with this kind of eventuality 
as its excuse 
for abuse after expensive abuse 
and it didn't have a clue 
look, another window to see through 
way up here 
on the 104th floor 
look 
another key 
another door 
10% literal 
90% metaphor 
3000 some poems disguised as people 
on an almost too perfect day 
should be more than pawns 
in some asshole's passion play 
so now it's your job 
and it's my job 
to make it that way 
to make sure they didn't die in vain 
sshhhhhh.... 
baby listen 
hear the train? 

You can doubt anything if you think about it long enough. 
Cause what happened always adjusts to fit what happened after that. 
And it's hard to feel like you are free. 
All you seem to do is referee. 
I remember when it was just you and me steppin' up to bat. 
And win or lose, just that we chose, this little war is what kills us. 
And either or it's that this war is, maybe also what thrills us. 
We thought we left possession behind. 
The truth is I was yours and you weren't mine. 
I've replayed a thousand times exactly what was said.
Cause nothing is as it appears. 
And the fun house mirrors of your fears
On a roller coaster of all these years with your hands above your head. 
And win or lose, just that we chose, this little war is what kills us.
And either or it's that this war is, maybe also what thrills us. 
And you know I don't care how fast you run 
Just tell me baby that when you're done with your little marathon 
That you still have cab fare home. 
Cause the finish line is a shifty thing and what is life with reckoning? 
And baby you are still the song I sing to myself when I'm alone. 
And win or lose just that you chose this little war is what kills you. 
And either or it's that this war is, maybe also what thrills you.

When I was four years old
They tried to test my I.Q.
They showed me a picture of 3 oranges and a pear
They said, which one is different?
It does not belong
They taught me different is wrong
But when I was 13 years old
I woke up one morning
Thighs covered in blood
Like a war
Like a warning
That I live in a breakable takeable body
An ever-increasingly valuable body
That a woman had come in the night to replace me
Deface me
See, my body is borrowed
Yeah, I got it on loan
For the time in between my mom and some maggots
I don't need anyone to hold me
I can hold my own
I got highways for stretchmarks
See where I've grown
I sing sometimes
Like my life is at stake
'Cause you're only as loud
As the noises you make
I'm learning to laugh as hard
As I can listen
'Cause silence
Is violence
In women and poor people
If more people were screaming then I could relax
But a good brain ain't diddley
If you don't have the facts
We live in a breakable takeable world
An ever available possible world
And we can make music
Like we can make do
Genius is in a back beat
Backseat to nothing if you're dancing
Especially something stupid
Like I.Q.
For every lie I unlearn
I learn something new
I sing sometimes for the war that I fight
'Cause every tool is a weapon -
If you hold it right.

In the jukebox of her memory
The list of names flips by and stops
She closes her eyes
And smiles as the record drops

Then she drinks herself up and out
Of her kitchen chair
And she dances out of time
As slow as she can sway
For as long as she can say 
This dance is mine
This dance is mine

Her hair bears silent witness
To the passing of time
Tattoos like mile markers
Map the distance she has gone
Winning some, losing some
She says my sister still calls every Sunday night
After the rates go down
And I can never manage to say anything right
My whole life blew up
And now its all coming down

And she says leave me alone
Tonight I just wanna stay home
She fills the pot with water
She drops in the bone
She says, I've got a darkness that I have to feed
I've got a sadness
That grows up around me like a weed
And I'm not hurting anyone
I'm just spiraling in
As she closes her eyes
And hears the song begin again

She appreciates the phone calls
The consoling cards and such
She appreciates all the people
Who come by and try to pull her back in touch
They try to hold the lid down tightly
And they try to shake well
But the oil and water
Just want to separate themselves

She drinks herself up and out of her kitchen chair
And she dances out of time
As slow as she can sway
For as long as she can say
This dance is mine
This dance is mine
This dance is mine

How can I go home
With nothing to say
I know you're going to look at me that way
And say what did you do out there
And what did you decide
You said you needed time
And you had time

You are a china shop
And I am a bull
You are really good food
And I am full
I guess everything is timing
I guess everything's been said
So I am coming home with an empty head

You'll say did they love you or what
I'll say they love what I do
The only one who really loves me is you
And you'll say girl did you kick some butt
And I'll say I don't really remember
But my fingers are sore
And my voice is too

You'll say it's really good to see you
You'll say I missed you horribly
You'll say let me carry that
Give that to me
And you will take the heavy stuff
And you will drive the car
And I'll look out the window making jokes
About the way things are

How can I go home
With nothing to say
I know you're going to look at me that way
And say what did you do out there
And what did you decide
You said you needed time

What what what what what did you think you were doing?
How how how how how did you think this would go?
When when when when when you showed up on my radar
Where where where where where did you think you would show?
What what what what what do you make of this station
How how how how how it pulls away from the train?
When when when when when if at all will you realize
Where where where where where do and done are the same?
What what what what what now you're out in the open
How how how how how do you think you can hide?
When when when when when will you find some nice soft sand
Where where where where where you can bury your pride?
What what what what what do you want from this lifetime?
How how how how how does your story line flow?
When when when when when you finally get to the punch line 
Where where where where where will the applause sign go?

And why why why why why don't you just take your bow
Cuz who's gonna love you now?

They told you your music
Could reach millions
That the choice was up to you
You told me they always pay for lunch
And they believe in what I do
And I wonder if you miss your old friends
Once you've proven what you're worth
Yeah I wonder
When you're a big star
Will you miss the earth

And I know you would always want more
I know you would never be done
'Cuz everyone is a fucking napoleon
Yeah everyone is a fucking napoleon

And the next time
That I saw you
You were larger than life
You came and you conquered
You were doing alright
You had an army of suits behind you
And all you had to be was willing
And I said I still make a pretty good living
You must make a killing a killing

And I hope that you are happy
I hope at least you are having fun
'Cuz but everyone is a fucking napoleon
Yeah everyone is a fucking napoleon

Now you think, so that is
The way it's gonna be
That's what this is all about
I think that that is
The way it always was
You chose not to notice until now
Yeah now that there's a problem
You call me up to confide
And you go on for over an hour
'Bout each one that took you for a ride

And I guess that you dialed my number
'Cuz you thought for sure that i'd agree
I said baby, you know I still love you
But how dare you complain to me

Everyone is a fucking napoleon
Yeah everyone is a fucking napoleon